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THE DAILY GROANER - August 1, 2018

Good Morning Groanies,


I must admit something, you know, to purge myself of the guilt. Actually, I'll admit to a few things. Okay, here it goes...

Sometimes, in a moment of desperation, I use the microwave to dry some of my laundry; usually socks and underwear. I sometimes got to PetSmart and pretend I have a dog. Oh, and I take a single penny to the bank and ask the teller to break it and when the teller says that it's not possible I say, "That's the last time I listen to him. I knew that penny didn't make any cents."

I feel so much better now. Thanks for listening. Now, I'm off to make some nuke some socks and get some squeak toys for nobody.

Groaningly yours,
Steve


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Jokes? Comments? Questions? Email Steve


*-- Can We Have A Word? --*

Husband: Do you know that on an average women says between 10,000 to 35,000 words a day?

Wife: Yes, that's because they have to repeat everything often to men.

Husband: What?



*-- Calling Off --*

A phone call came to a school.

Caller: My daughter can't come to school today.

School Secretary: Alright, but what's the relation between you and the student?

Caller: This is my mother speaking.



*-- Q and A Quickies --*

Q: Did you hear about that new broom?

A: It's sweeping the nation!


Q: What stays in the corner and travels all over the world?

A: A stamp.

***

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