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THE DAILY GROANER - December 14, 2016

Good Morning Groanies,

Just in case you were wondering, winter begins in one week. No, I'm not kidding!

It's been so freakin' cold for so long that it seems like winter started months ago. What happened to autumn? Did I miss a meeting?

Don't worry about me though, I've been battling the cold in my own special way... which consists of microwaving my socks and underwear before putting them on.

Groaningly yours,

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Jokes? Comments? Questions? Email Steve

*-- Q and A Quickies --*

Q: Why did the elf put his bed into the fireplace?

A: He wanted to sleep like a log!

Q: What do reindeer always say before telling you a joke?

A: This one will sleigh you!

*-- A Cheap Gift --*

After being away on business for a week before Christmas, Tom thought it would be nice to bring his wife a little gift.

"How about some perfume?" he asked the cosmetics clerk. She showed him a bottle costing $50.

"That's a bit much," said Tom, so she returned with a smaller bottle for $30.

"That's still quite a bit," Tom groused.

Growing disgusted, the clerk brought out a tiny $15 bottle.

Tom grew agitated, "What I mean," he said, "is I'd like to see something real cheap."

So the clerk handed him a mirror.

*-- More Q and A Quickies --*

Q: Why does Scrooge love Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer?

A: Because every buck is dear to him.

Q: Why is it so cold on Christmas?

A: Because it's in Decembrrrrrrrrrr!


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