THE DAILY GROANER - February 8, 2016

Good Morning Groanies,

I overheard a conversation about bad dates the other day and it got me thinking, there are times when saying the wrong thing can ruin an otherwise wonderful evening. Here are a few of those "wrong things"...

Questions Not To Be Asked On A 1st Date
1. Are those real?
2. Did you know that you look just like my mom?
3. Wanna take a shower with me?
4. Guess what I was in jail for?
5. Did you just fart?
6. Would you like to know who's in the urn?
7. Did you ever wonder what human flesh tastes like?
8. Would you like to hear about my alien abduction?
9. Do you let your dogs watch you do it?
10. You don't hear voices, do you? Me neither, a couple of times.

These questions will surely guarantee that you would not be eligible for a second date, but then again the world is a strange, twisted place.

Groaningly yours,
Steve

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Jokes? Comments? Questions? Email Steve


*-- Q and A Quickies --*
Q: What's the best part about living in Switzerland?

A: Not sure, but the flag is a big plus.


Q: Why didn't the lifeguard save the hippie?

A: Because he was too far out man!


*-- More Q and A Quickies --*
Q: What does the sign on an out-of-business brothel say?

A: Beat it. We're closed.


Q: What is the difference between ignorance and apathy?

A: I don't know, and I don't care.


*-- Even More Q and A Quickies --*
Q: What's the difference between snowmen and snowladies?

A: Snowballs!


Q: What do you call a bear with no teeth?

A: A gummy bear!

***
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