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THE DAILY GROANER - May 18, 2016

Good Morning Groanies,

When I was a teenager I always wanted to be in a band. I couldn't carry a tune in a bucket, but I wanted to be part of it. Actually, the part I really wanted to play was the guy who comes up with the name for the band. I guess I'd prefer to be a footnote than a frontman.

Here are a few of the gems that I've come up with in the past. Enjoy!

1. Barb and the Stingrays
2. Red Eyes and the Empties
3. Booger and the Snots
4. Ink and the Ballpoints
5. Fart and the Cheese-Cutters
6. Shoe Lace and the Tongues
7. Chuckles and the Gigglers
8. Barf Bag and the Dry Heaves
9. Meat and Potatoes
10. PU and the Stinkers

Rock on, right?

Groaningly yours,

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Jokes? Comments? Questions? Email Steve

*-- It Doesn't Make You Fat --*

Wine Does NOT Make You FAT.

It Makes You LEAN... Against Tables, Chairs, Floors, Walls and Ugly People.

(Joke Submitted by: BBIX34)

*-- A New Illness --*

A woman calls her boss one morning and tells him that she is staying home because she is not feeling well.

"What's the matter?" he asks.

"I have a case of anal glaucoma," she says in a weak voice.

"What the hell is anal glaucoma?"

"I can't see my ass coming into work today."

(Joke Submitted by: BBIX34)

*-- Q and A Quickies --*

Q: Why was the boy sitting on his watch?

A: Because he wanted to be on time.

Q: What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

A: No thanks, I'm stuffed.


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