THE DAILY GROANER - December 10, 2014

Good Morning Groanies,

Thank you all for your emails congratulating us on our "Future Baby". We are very excited!

We told everyone we know over the weekend and it seems that the masses are happy, excited, overjoyed, ecstatic, pleased, elated, thrilled, delighted, chipper (what's that?), and tickled. That's good because most people are not that thrilled with sequels.

Trust me, this kid is going to be the Godfather: Part 2, Aliens, Terminator 2, Grumpier Old Men, Toy Story 2, "Crocodile" Dundee II, and The Road Warrior of babies.

Groaningly yours,
Steve

P.S. PulseTV customers, remember that Monday, December 15th (by 10 a.m. Central Time) is the last day to get your order in time for Christmas with standard shipping!

Jokes? Comments? Questions? Email Steve


*-- What's With All the Yelling? --*
At the typical Christmas dinner, Mom is always yelling, "Get out of my kitchen!"

The grown kids are always yelling at their tiny offspring, "Stop running! You'll break Grandma's furniture!"

Dad is always yelling, "Get out of the way! I can't see the TV set!"

The little ones are yelling, "It's my toy! Let me play with it!"

This is why this is known as the Holler Day Season.


*-- The Cold Kayak --*
Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the craft. Unsurprisingly it sank, proving once again that you can't have your kayak and heat it too.


*-- Q and A Quickies --*
Q: What did the rabbit give his girlfriend for Christmas?

A: A 14 carrot ring.


Q: Why is it so cold on Christmas?

A: Because it's in Decembrrrrrrrrrr!

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