THE DAILY GROANER - Monday, June 18th 2012

Good Morning Groanies,

Yesterday was my very first Father's Day, and it was also Father's Day to all of those fathers who are fathers to those kids or children that they have fathered at one time or another. I hope that all of the proud papas out there know just how lucky they are.

It's weird being a dad. I mean it's still a bit surreal to me. My little boy, Jack, is at home with his mom, my wife, right now. It's unbelievable. All we did was wait 9 months, go to the hospital, and then they gave us a free baby, just like that.

I have a wonderful boy that insists on puking, peeing and pooping on me without warning, but he's so cute when he does it... and we have a washing machine. He may not be able to understand me when I talk to him, but he knows that I'm there.

Being a father has its ups and downs, but I wouldn't trade it for anything. And it's also important to note that I wouldn't be half the dad that I am if I didn't have an amazing woman to partner up with when it comes to being a parent. Stacy is wonderful. I couldn't have done this without her, both literally and figuratively. She's keeps me sane and keeps me smiling.

Groaningly yours,
Steve

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*-- Anything You Want --*
A man came home from work and was greeted by his wife dressed in a teddy.

"Tie me up," she purred, "and you can do anything you want."

So he tied her up and went out for a round of golf.


*-- Q and A Quickies --*
Q: What does a jellyfish have on its tummy?

A: A jelly button.


Q:What did the the Roman emperor say when he saw his best friend scarf down an entire can of Starkist?

A: Et tuna, Brute?


*-- More Q and A Quickies --*
Q: What do you call a penguin in the desert?

A: Lost.


Q: What do whales like to chew?

A: Blubber gum.

***
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