THE DAILY GROANER - Wednesday, June 19th 2013

Good Morning Groanies,

My in-laws invited us over to go for a dip in their pool this coming weekend. I enjoy a relaxing swim as much as the next person, but this time I hope that I remember to bring my suit.

Last summer, we had received the same invite and I had forgotten to pack my swim trunks. My father-in-law said that I could borrow a pair of his and when I couldn't find one I had to improvise.

Ultimately, my mother-in-law did have me purchase her a brand-new bathing suit because my figure really did a number on it. Hey, it was only fair.

This year I think that I'll be smart for once and just wear my trunks over there.

Groaningly yours,
Steve

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Jokes? Comments? Questions? Email Steve


*-- I'm Not Paying! --*
Three animals were having a drink in a cafe, when the owner asked for the money.

"I'm not paying," said the duck. "I've only got one bill and I'm not breaking it."

"I've spent my last buck," said the deer.

"Then the duck'll have to pay," said the skunk.

"Getting here cost me my last scent."


*-- Old Man and Ice Cream --*
A little old man shuffled slowly into an ice cream parlor and pulled himself slowly, painfully, up onto a stool.

After catching his breath he ordered a banana split. The waitress asked kindly, "Crushed nuts?"

"No," he replied, "arthritis.


*-- Q and A Quickies --*
Q: What kind of horses go out after dusk?

A: Nightmares!


Q: What do you get when you cross a frog with a rabbit?

A: A Bunny Ribbit!

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