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THE DAILY GROANER - June 1, 2016

Good Morning Groanies,


I was just thinking...

Why is there a shortstop between 2nd and 3rd base but not 1st and 2nd?

Why are sleeveless t-shirts still identified as t-shirts?

Why don't people smoke cigarettes with their nostrils rather than their mouths?

Why does Winnie the Pooh wear a shirt, but he doesn't wear pants?

Why isn't a moon roof in the shape of a butt?

These are just a few of the things that I thought about while I waited for my arm to be freed from the soda machine.

Groaningly yours,
Steve


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Jokes? Comments? Questions? Email Steve


*-- Does Anyone Know? --*

We were celebrating the 100th anniversary of our church, and several former pastors and the bishop were in attendance.

At one point, our minister had the children gather at the altar for a talk about the importance of the day.

He began by asking, "Does anyone know what the bishop does?" There was silence. Finally, one little boy answered gravely, "He's the one you can move diagonally."



*-- Milking the Cow --*

A farmer was milking his cow. He was just starting to get a good rhythm going when a bug flew into the barn and started circling his head.

Suddenly, the bug flew into the cow's ear. The farmer didn't think much about it, until the bug squirted out into his bucket.

It went in one ear and out the udder.



*-- Q and A Quickies --*

Q: Why was the sick man arrested in his car?

A: For Driving Under the Influenza.


Q: What are two things you don't eat for breakfast?

A: Lunch and dinner.

***

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