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THE DAILY GROANER - March 7, 2016

Good Morning Groanies,


Everyone has a dream job. I have a few that I don't mind sharing here today. Here's a list of my dream jobs.

1. Mattress Tester
2. Moon Howler
3. Pool Boy
4. Professional Laundry Folder
5. Movie Critic
6. World Renown Bad Dancer
7. Ref At Women's Mud Wrestling
8. Nacho Eater
9. New Cereal Tryer Outer
10. Drunken Bowler

These all seem like excellent career choices. Wouldn't you like to get paid for one of these jobs? What are your dream jobs?

Groaningly yours,
Steve


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Jokes? Comments? Questions? Email Steve


*-- What Are You Gonna Call It? --*

"I heard about a college girl who went to a fraternity beer party, got drunk, spent the night with one of the frat boys and soon discovered she was pregnant.

"After her baby was born, she decided to write a book about her experience.

She chose to call: "From Beer to Maternity"


*-- What's So Funny? --*

Two missionaries were apprehended by a tribe of very hostile cannibals who put them in a large pot of water, built a huge fire under it, and left them there.

A few minutes later, one of the missionaries started to laugh uncontrollably.

The other missionary couldn't believe it! He said, "What's wrong with you? We're being boiled alive! They're gonna eat us! What could possibly be funny at a time like this?"

The other missionary replied, "I just peed in the soup!"


*-- Q and A Quickies --*

Q: What do you call a penguin in the Sahara Desert?

A: Lost.


Q: What did the 0 say to the 8?

A: Nice belt.

***

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