THE DAILY GROANER - September 12, 2016

Good Morning Groanies,

The boys and I went out to take care of the grocery shopping the other day.

It was like any other shopping trip. Sean sat in the cart with his little hands ready to grab any and all items that he could reach. Jack was roaming around in search of cereal, toys and various cheeses. I was stressing out about whether or not we needed spaghetti sauce or not. You know, the usual.

When we arrived at the checkout Jack suddenly began to circle the cart. Around and around he went with a shark circling its prey. When I asked him what he was doing Jack immediately stopped and cried out, "I am not a lunatic!"

The cashier looked at me rather shocked and puzzled. So I turned to the cashier and calmly replied, "That's debatable. And we're not going to need these Cocoa Puffs."

Kids do say the darnedest things...in public...at the top of their lungs. Good times!

Groaningly yours,
Steve

P.S. Did you miss an issue? You can read every issue from the Gophercentral library of newsletters on our exhaustive archives page. Thousands of issues, all of your favorite publications in chronological order. You can read AND comment. Just click GopherArchives

Jokes? Comments? Questions? Email Steve


*-- Why Would You Think That? --*
A woman and her little girl were visiting the grave of the little girl's grandmother. On their way through the cemetery back to the car, the little girl asked, "Mommy, do they ever bury two people in the same grave?"

"Of course not, dear." replied the mother, "Why would you think that?"

"The tombstone back there said, 'Here lies a lawyer and an honest man.'"



*-- 61 Days! --*
Three blondes have just finished a jigsaw-puzzle so they decide to celebrate by going out. They walk into a bar chanting, "61 days! 61 days!"

The bartender gets curious and walks over to them and asks, "Why are you chanting 61 days?"

One of the three answer, "Because the box said 3-to-6 years!"



*-- Q and A Quickies --*
Q: What does a cannibal call a skateboarder?

A: Meals on wheels!


Q: What airline do ghosts fly with?

A: British Scareways!

***
Missed an Issue? Visit the Daily Groaner Archives