THE DAILY GROANER - April 1, 2015

Good Morning Groanies,

It's April Fool's Day! And I'm really trying to keep from being foolish in any way, shape, or from... form, dagnabbit!

Oh, so 'Future Baby' is only two months away from getting the old eviction notice. We're so excited for his arrival, but not looking forward to the sleepless nights, the poopy diapers, and the using of my credit card to order pizzas and pay-per-view; don't ask.

I still can't believe I'm going to be a dad again. I guess "again" isn't the right word. I'm still a dad. It's an on-going thing. It's not like I have two degrees in fatherhood or something like that. Soon I'll be Steve: Father of two, bank account of zero.

Oh, I'm just being a silly goose. I love my boys. Well, I haven't met the second on yet, but I'm remaining positive.

I'm looking forward to the future. I don't know what's going to happen, but I'm going to have three loving people at home to experience it all with me. Hey, you can't beat that! And two of them will be my tiny accomplices in whatever silly shenanigans I can think up. The possibilities are endless.

Have a silly and fun April Fool's Day. "I know I am," he thought while photocopying his butt.

Groaningly yours,
Steve

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Jokes? Comments? Questions? Email Steve


*-- Doc, What's Wrong With Me? --*
A naked man comes running into the doctor's office with nothing but a strip of saran wrap around his waist, and says "Doctor, doctor, what's wrong with me?"

The doctor answers, "Well, I can clearly see you're nuts."


*-- All Dogs Go to Heaven --*
Mom and Dad were trying to console Susie, whose dog had recently died.

"You know, it's not your fault that the dog died. He's probably up in heaven right now, having a grand old time with God."

Susie, still crying, said, "What would God want with a dead dog?"


*-- Q and A Quickies --*
Q: Where do you go to replace a missing chess piece?

A: The Pawn Shop.


Q: What did the big watch hand say to the small hand?

A: Got a minute?

***
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