THE DAILY GROANER - Wednesday, May 23rd 2012

Good Morning Groanies,

It's a boy! That's right, folks. On Friday, May 11th, at 8:31 in the morning, my son was brought into this world. It was quite an experience. One that I will never forget.

Let me just say that my wife Stacy has been wonderful through all of the pregnancy highs and lows, and now the non-stop thrills and excitement of parenthood. I am so thankful for her and I couldn't do this without her. Oh, and she was a mother for Mother's Day. It's funny how things work out, isn't it?

Both mom and our little guy are doing great. Dad is doing okay too. We're all just a little tired, but it's all worth it.

Well, I just wanted to touch base and give you the good news. I'm sure you're dying to know his name, weight, shoe size, and his favorite cereal, radio station and color, but I'm going to save the stories and info for next week.

So check back on Monday for the story of hilarious thing my boy did when I saw him for the first time. He's definitely his father's son.

Groaningly yours,
Steve

P.S. Are you on Facebook? If you are, check out the Deal of the Day fan page. You get exclusive offers and a new deal every day. It is easy to become a fan, just Click Here and hit the like button...

Jokes? Questions? Comments? Email Steve

Now You Can Follow the Daily Groaner on Twitter: DailyGroaner


*-- The Perfect Shot --*
A guy stood over his tee shot for what seemed an eternity; looking up, looking down, measuring the distance, figuring the wind direction and speed. Finally his exasperated partner says, "What's taking so long? Hit the blasted ball!"

The guy answers, "My wife is up there watching me from the clubhouse. I want to make this a perfect shot."

"Forget it, man - you don't stand a chance of hitting her from here!"


*-- Great One-Liners --*
I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger, then it hit me.

Police were called to a day care where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.

To write with a broken pencil is pointless.

The short fortune teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.

A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.

The dead batteries were given out free of charge.

A dentist and a manicurist fought tooth and nail.

A bicycle can't stand alone; it is two tired.


*-- Q and A Quickies --*
Q: Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off?

A: He's all right now.


Q: What happens when the smog lifts in Los Angeles?

A: U.C.L.A.

Missed an Issue? Visit the Daily Groaner Archives