THE DAILY GROANER - Wednesday, Feb. 13th 2013

Good Morning Groanies,

A co-worker wanted to let me know about one of her favorite movies. I don't want to say the name of the movie because I'd like you to let me know if you can guess from the synopsis she sent me. Here it is...

"About a guy named Hoops who isn't good at basketball. After he graduated he didn't know what he wanted to do so he went with his friends to Nantucket (don't know where that is but you have to take a boat there). He meets a girl he likes and tells her he's good at basketball cuz of his name, but anyhow...her grandma is losing her home or a home for others and she has to raise money to save it. She sings but doesn't make any money at it. So hoop and his friends race a boat to win her grandmas house back. And it has that guy from Police in it (why you so fat)."

Do you know what movie it is? Let me know if you do because I don't have a clue.

Groaningly yours,
Steve

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Jokes? Comments? Questions? Email Steve


*-- What Do You Have to Say? --*
A man drinks a shot of whiskey every night before bed. After years of this, the wife wants him to quit; she gets two shot glasses, filling one with water and the other with whiskey.

After getting him to the table that had the glasses, she brings his bait box. She says "I want you to see this." She puts a worm in the water it, and it swims around.

She puts a worm in the whiskey, and the worm dies immediately. She then says, feeling that she has made her point clear, "what do you have to say about this experiment?"

He responds by saying: "If I drink whiskey, I won't get worms!"


*-- The Motorway and the Tarmac --*
A motorway walks into a pub one day. He goes up to the bar and orders himself a drink. He just sits down when in walks a strip of tarmac.

The motorway sees the tarmac and starts to panic so he jumps over the bar and ducks down so it won't see him. The barman looks down at him and says, "What's the matter with you? Why are you hiding? You've got six lanes and two hard shoulders. Why are you frightened of a piece of tarmac?

The motorway replies, "You don't know him like I do. He's a cyclepath."


*-- Q and A Quickies --*
Q: What stories do the ship captain's children like to hear?

A: Ferry tales!


Q: How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

A: By flood lighting!

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