Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Greetings fellow Bizarros:

I have to share this story I just read with you. I'm like Indiana Jones when it comes to snakes. I just can't handle them...and when I read this it totally freaked me out.

A St. Petersburg, Florida man received a rude awakening earlier this week when he lifted the lid on his toilet and found a snake curled inside, with its head sticking out of the bowl!

It turns out the slippery stow-away was a 6-foot African rock python. Experts said the serpent is just a baby, as African rock pythons get as big as 20 feet long or longer.

The man even called his boss and told him he'd be late because he'd had to wrestle a snake out of his toilet. His boss joked he would need a better excuse than that. So he brought the snake into work with him.

You don't get to use an excuse like that every day!

So for the last four days I've been checking the toilet religiously every time I go into the bathroom. The wife thinks I'm nuts since it's winter here in the Chicago area. But you only have to be wrong once!

Bizarrely,
Lewis

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*-- Theme park Cinderella accepts proposal --*
QUEENSBURY, N.Y. - A New York state theme park Cinderella accepted a surprise proposal from her service member boy-friend when he popped the question while she was at work. Sarah Cordts, 21, who has played Cinderella at Six Flags' The Great Escape theme park in Queensbury for eight years, said she knew her boyfriend, U.S. Navy Lt. Russell Lidberg, 29, was visiting the park for Heroes Week, but he shocked her when he approached her with a glass slipper and an engagement ring, The (Glen Falls) Post-Star reported Monday. "He got down on one knee, and pulled out the most beautiful, sparkling diamond ring, and said 'Cinderella, will you live happily ever after with me?'" Cordts said. "And of course I said, 'Yes! A thousand times yes!'" Lidberg said he coordinated the proposal with Six Flags bosses, who gave Cordts the rest of her shift off to celebrate. The couple said they spent the remainder of the day walking around the park and receiving congratulations.

*-- Man arrested for allegedly fishing nude --*
SPOKANE, Wash. - Authorities in Washington state said they arrested a man accused of fishing nude on the bank of a lake where he was spotted by other anglers. Spokane County sheriff's deputies said a man fishing with his two young sons on West Medical Lake reported spotting the man fishing nude on the west bank of the lake at about 2:15 p.m. Sunday, KCPQ-TV, Spokane, Wash., reported Tuesday. Deputies said the man, Dean Meginniss, 54, had put on a pair of shorts at the urging of resort employees before they arrived. They said Meginniss had an outstanding warrant for stalking and he was arrested on the warrant and an additional charge of indecent exposure. The sheriff's office said the indecent exposure charge is a felony because he has a previous conviction for the same charge from 2009. Meginniss was booked into the Spokane County Jail.

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*-- READER COMMENTS --*
I believe the creature in Jersey is known as "the Jersey Devil" and has been part of NJ lore for ages. Hence, the moniker of their hockey team.

Lewis, I have always loved your column. Don't always agree but do love it. Loved the article about the legally blind lady WOW what great idea. Thanks. -Shelley

Lewis, I always enjoy BN, and your snarky comments. However, I have to ask you: what are the odds of an article about "Big Red Eye" and an article about an 8' pot plant being unrelated? -Curiously, Mindela

Yes I did take all of the fun out of the lobster story. But so many times well meaning environmentalists do huge damage to the environment by "helping". It is kind of like the classic of putting a winter deer feeding station across a highway and road killing 60 to 70 of the local deer population. A bit of perspective and respect for the environment would go a long way. â??John

*-- END OF READER COMMENTS --*
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