Bizarre News - September 23, 2015

Greetings fellow Bizarros:

They're called the munchies. And when they hit you have got to do something about it. Anyone who has been on their way home at three in the morning after a long night knows that feeling.

That's why I think most people can sympathize, at least a little bit, with this Florida man who was out of options one early morning.

Police said that the man broke into two houses in Boca Raton, first to steal a pizza and then to take a nap.

The incident began about 3:00 a.m., when a 19-year-old woman found 24-year-old Milor Michel inside her home.

The woman said that she and her roommate found him in the kitchen, rummaging through their refrigerator before he removed pizza, according to the arrest report.

He then sat down on the couch to eat the pizza. He told the two roommates that he was a friend of their other roommate. The women did not believe him and demanded that he leave the house.

After leaving the home, Michel entered another house in the neighborhood and fell asleep on the couch.

A 19-year-old woman who lived there, found Michel sleeping just before 7:00 a.m. Next to him was a half a container of orange juice. She asked the man to leave while another roommate called police.

Michel is accused of theft of an occupied structure.

Bizarrely,
Lewis

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* PETA sues to give monkey ownership of selfie *
SAN FRANCISCO - Animal rights group People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals filed a lawsuit in San Francisco seeking to give a monkey ownership of its selfie photo. The group filed a U.S. federal court lawsuit in San Francisco arguing Naruto, a macaque monkey known to researchers in Indonesia, should be the legal owner of pictures he snapped in 2011 using a camera set up by photographer David J. Slater. The lawsuit names Slater; his company, Wildlife Personalities Ltd.; and publisher Blurb, which issued a collection of Slater's photographs that included two of the selfies snapped by Naruto. The suit is seeking to have the monkey declared the "author" and legal owner of the photograph. The picture has been in dispute for more than a year. Website Wikimedia Commons posted some of the pictures snapped by the monkey last year, labeling them public domain, and Slater attempted to have them removed, claiming the copyright he obtained in Britain should be applied globally. "I've told them it's not public domain, they've got no right to say that it's public domain. A monkey pressed the button, but I did all the setting up," Slater told the National Post last year. Wikimedia refused to remove the pictures, saying Slater doesn't own the copyright on the image because he didn't shoot the photo himself. "Our argument is simple: U.S. copyright law doesn't prohibit an animal from owning a copyright, and since Naruto took the photo, he owns the copyright, as any human would," PETA said in a press release.


*-- Mom: Boy's pre-K teacher called left-handedness 'evil,' 'unlucky' --*
OKEMEH, Okla. - An Oklahoma mom said her 4-year-old son's pre-K teacher forced him to write with his right hand and sent home an article calling left-handedness "evil." Alisha Sands said her 4-year-old son, Zayde, started pre-K recently at Oakes Elementary in Okemah and she noticed last week while he was doing homework that he was using his right hand despite being left-handed. "I just asked 'Is there anything his teachers ever asked about his hands?' And he raises this one and says this one's bad," Sands told KFOR-TV. Sands said she sent a note to school with Zayde and the teacher's response was to send home an article that said left-handedness is "unlucky," "evil" and "sinister." "For example, the devil is often portrayed as left-handed," the article said. Sands said the teacher's response shocked her. "It breaks my heart for him because someone actually believes that, believes my child is evil because he's left handed, it's crazy," Sands said. The mother said she contacted the superintendent with the article, but there was no action taken. "There was no suspension of any kind. There was basically nothing done to this teacher," Sands said. "She told them she thought I needed literature on it." Sands said she is trying to get Zayde transferred to another class. "I don't feel like the school did what they were supposed to for him," Sands said. The principal at Oakes Elementary said officials are investigating the matter and declined to comment further.


*-- READER COMMENTS --*
The laser pointer story shows you can't trust a cat. That sneaky cat probably had it all planned out. -Greg

LEWIS; While I'm not familiar with Louisiana laws, in Illinois riding a bicycle while under influnce of alcohol can carry same penalties as operating a motor vehicle while drunk. Thus if a driver has a 1 year license suspension for first drunk driving conviction and is then caught riding his bicycle while intoxicated he can then be ticketed and convicted of a second DUI and thus have that license suspension extended. However even in Illinois I've never heard of any DUI laws relating to horse-back riding. -R.S.
[I'd hate to lose my bicycle riding license.]

You worry about 10,000 gun deaths a year when the drug cartel (FDA, AMA et.al.) Routinely kill 5000 people a month, every month year in and year out. Your doctor is a hell of a lot bigger danger to you than you realize.
[Oh no, I realize exactly how dangerous doctors (and the drugs they love to prescribe) can be. I am a big fan of modern, western medicine, but in the end the American medical and pharmaceutical industries are businesses...and they don't make money on healthy people.]

You are very brave to make your opinions known in this newsletter. I can only imagine the torrent of emails you must have received after that newsletter went out. My personal opinion you probably shoud've kept your opinion out of a newsletter of this kind. I will refrain from stating my opinion on gun control. Love your letter but, although I'm sure it's sometimes very tough not to give it, please keep from stating your opinion highly controversial subject matter.
[Sooo...you wrote to tell me that you're opinion is that I shouldn't share my opinion? Then I guess I won't give you my opinion on your opinion. Opinion.]

Lewis; In the comments section you stated that there may be a little leakage of guns across our borders if guns were banned. Yeah, just like there was a little leakage of alcohol across the lakes into Chicago during prohibition. Chicago, New York and Washington DC have the toughest anti-gun laws on the books yet have the highest crime and murder rates of any American city. -Wes
[There is a big difference between keeping firearms out of a city with no borders and keeping them out of the country.]

*-- END OF READER COMMENTS --*
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