Saturday, August 11, 2012

Greetings fellow Bizarros:

This would make a great horror story if it weren't real. A 28-year-old beautician and former University of Memphis law student has developed a condition so severe, fingernails grow from the hair follicles all over her body.

You read that right. Doctors at Johns Hopkins Medical Center in Baltimore, where she is being treated, told her family that she is the only person in the world with this bizarre condition.

The woman was a junior studying criminal justice when the mystery illness first occurred in September 2009. She went to an emergency room for an asthma attack and was given a large dose of steroids, which doctors suspected caused an allergic reaction.

After returning home, she began itching. Doctors prescribed Benadryl, but it got worse. Soon, her legs turned black. Eventually, her body was scabbed all over. Meanwhile, all tests came back negative.

Doctors finally gave up trying to diagnose her.

In August 2011, she went to Johns Hopkins. There, doctors determined that she was producing 12 times the number of skin cells in each hair follicle. Instead of growing hair, the follicles were producing human nails.

On her blog, she wrote: "It has taken all of my hair out and has left my body with scabs all over it, plus I have lost about 200 pounds. Two years ago, I was a healthy woman on my own...had big dreams and goals that I was following until one day my body completely shut down on me."

Today she is on 25 medications and improving, but there is still no cure. It may sound unsympathetic, but I wonder what they are going to call the disease?

Bizarrely,
Lewis

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* Dancing inmate reveals drugs in his bottom *
CHARLOTTETOWN, Prince Edward Island - A naked and drunk Canadian inmate doing a cartoon impersonation dance unintentionally showed jail guards a plastic bag containing drugs hidden in his backside. The man had been arrested while cavorting on a street with a beer in one hand and a cheeseburger in the other in Charlottetown, Prince Edward Island, The National Post reported. Jail officers suspected the man had also ingested drugs, so he was ordered to undress in a cell for observation. The man reportedly asked guards if they were familiar with the animated character Cyril Sneer, an evil pink aardvark. Court heard he then tucked his genitals between his legs, bent over and began dancing like the character moves, the report said. During his performance, guards noticed a piece of plastic protruding from his bottom. It was found to contain four doses of the powerful painkiller Hydromorphone, guards said. Troy Campbell pleaded guilty to drug possession and was fined $805, the report said.

* Boy had toy part stuck in nose for three years *

SALT LAKE CITY - A Utah boy can breathe better and smell aromas, his father says, now that a rubber wheel from a toy, lodged in his nose for three years, has been removed. The constant congestion and snoring of Isaak Lasson, 6, baffled his parents and doctors, until an ear, nose and throat specialist snaked a camera up the Salt Lake City boy's nose. "There it was, a ball of fungus," said Isaak's dad, Craig Lasson. Inside the ball was a dime-sized wheel of soft rubber, a piece of a toy. Isaak admitted putting "some spaghetti in there that hadn't come out," his father told ABC News, but "We have no idea what it is or where it came from." The wheel is now treated like a trophy, sitting in a container atop the family refrigerator, and "Isaak thinks it's great. He wants to show it to all his friends," his father said, noting his son has more energy and a better appetite, since he can now smell his mother's cooking.

*-- READER COMMENTS --*
There was a motive for the woman's attempt at kidnapping. She wanted to keep her marriage intact. Her husband threaten to leave her so she made up that she was pregnant hoping that he would still be with her. Since she really wasn't, hence the plan to steal someone else's child. Foiled by modern technology. -Jack West
[What a shame, because I'm sure that plan would have worked.]

Lewis, I was daydreaming to a friend about winning the lottery. He said 'You'd never get another good nights sleep.' Huh? He said if you won $100 million, do you think there might possibly be some sick son-of-a-bitch out there who'd kidnap your wife, kids, even nieces and nephews for $10 million. What would you do, let your sisters kid die? All your dreams and your worst nightmare comes true. All I'd thought about was mooching relatives and 'old friends'. -Don Hoehn
[That's a little paranoid, if you ask me. However, there was that one lottery winner who was murdered by his own sister and her boyfriend. In that case his worst nightmare WAS his family!]

Lewis, A rancher in Wyoming was charged with having a romantic relationship with a sheep. He was hauled into court where the judge asked him if it was a ewe or a ram, The guy shouted, "It was a ewe your honor....for Christ's sakes I'm not a homosexual."

*-- END OF READER COMMENTS --*
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