Wednesday, February 6, 2013

Greetings fellow Bizarros:

When are we going to start teaching kids that war is not the answer? Take, for example, an incident that happened at a California high school where a group of students were playing a "war game", specifically tug-of-war, during a Spirit Week celebration.

During the "game" two teenagers had several of their fingers ripped off!

The boy and girl, both under age 18, had stable vital signs after undergoing hours of surgery. The teens lost four fingers each from their right hand, and the girl also lost the thumb on her left hand.

The rope was wrapped around the students' hands, and it snapped, amputating their fingers. After the incident officials said they will review all planned Spirit Week activities "that could even possibly have a risk of going wrong."

"I've never heard of anything like this happening," School District Superintendent Nick J. Salerno said. "It's unbelievable to me, it's shocking."

But things like this have happened before. In 2007, two students at a high school in Parker, Colo., had their right hands partially severed during a tug-of-war at a pep rally, and in 2008, an 8-year-old girl nearly lost four fingers the same way when her hand got tangled in a rope in Minnesota.

Meanwhile, in Miami woman was jailed on contempt charges after giving a judge "the finger" during a drug possession hearing, but at least she got to take her finger to jail with her.

Bizarrely,
Lewis

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Questions? Comments? Email Lewis


*-- Students take up tubas for V-day --*
MEMPHIS - A group of about a dozen tuba players at the University of Memphis said they are taking Valentine's Day requests for romantic serenades. Zack Corpus, a member of the tuba troupe, said the Scheidt School of Music students will play two-song serenades while delivering chocolates and cards to the sweethearts of those who pay the determined fee, The (Memphis) Commercial Appeal reported Monday. "It's so much more unique to have tuba valentines because there's a kind of novelty to it. Plus, it's a lot more embarrassing," Corpus said. Corpus said the songs in the group's repertoire include "My Girl" by The Temptations, "A Whole New World" from Disney's "Aladdin," "I Can't Help Myself" by The Temptations, "Everything I Do" by Brian Adams and "You Belong With Me" by Taylor Swift. Corpus said the fees start at $25 for an on-campus performance and increase for off-campus appearances. The group said they are hoping to raise at least $1,000 for the school of music.


*-- Man shoots self in groin with flare gun --*
LEHIGH ACRES, Fla. - Authorities in Florida said a man was hospitalized with burn wounds after accidentally shooting himself in the groin with a flare gun. The Lee County Sheriff's Office said deputies responded to a medical assistance call Sunday in Lehigh Acres and arrived to find Jorge Perez, 23, with multiple burns and lacerations on his genital region, WZVN-TV, Fort Myers, reported Tuesday. Perez told deputies he had loaded the flare gun and set it down Sunday. He later picked it up and, forgetting he had loaded it, fired it at the ground. The man said the flare bounced off the floor and struck him in the genitals.


*-- READER COMMENTS --*
Lewis, that should be "YOU ARE welcome" shortened to "YOU'RE welcome" - NOT "your welcome". Am sure it was just a slip in YOUR case, but I have seen that people on the Internet don't seem to know the difference. -Cecille
[Thank you. I'll immediately have the asshole who made that mistake fired.]

Hey, Lewis, this probably belongs more in TZ's or Joe's newsletter...but the simple fact is that guns don't kill people...bullets do. -Chris
[What if someone hit you really hard on the head with a gun?]

I can always count on you for the crude, rude stuff! Keep it up! I seem to be aging and talking to Vetrans is my only source of entertainment! That and trying Jack Daniels specialties! -Rose
[You should try talking to veterans WHILE drinking. That'll get you some interesting stories.]

what ever happen to your announcements of what day it is i.e. national lobster day, national bubble gum day national ding bat day etc, etc...
[I had to fire the guy who usually looks those up for failing to catch a punctuation error involving an apostrophe.]

*-- END OF READER COMMENTS --*

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