Wednesday, January 23, 2013

Greetings fellow Bizarros:

Normally I ignore stories about middle-aged teachers seducing their teenage students because this is 2013 and it is just not that bizarre anymore. In fact, I wish I had a few of those hot, horny, female teachers when I was a freshman in high school. But this story crosses over the line from inappropriate to "What the f#$%?"

It seems a former Brunswick County, North Carolina teacher charged with having sex with a student won't face trial after marrying the victim.

Court records show Shipman divorced her husband of 19 years last year and six days later married 17-year-old student Johnnie Ray Ison. His mother signed documents allowing him to marry while a minor.

The marriage prevented prosecutors from compelling Ison to testify against Shipman. A spouse can't be forced to testify against the defendant in most criminal cases.

The 42-year-old Shipman has pleaded guilty to a lesser misdemeanor charge of resisting a public officer.

Shipman taught at Brunswick County Academy when she was arrested in January 2009 on charges of sexual offense with a student, statutory rape and taking indecent liberties with a student.

Bizarrely,
Lewis

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Questions? Comments? Email Lewis


*-- Buddhist temple for sale due to odor --*
NAKHON PATHOM, Thailand - A Buddhist abbot in Thailand said his temple is being listed for sale because of the constant "stench" from a nearby pet food factory. Luang Pu Buddha Issara, the abbot of Wat Or Noi in Nakhon Pathom, said he wants to sell the temple, which was founded in 1990, for $67 million and donate the proceeds to a foundation, the Bangkok Post reported Monday. "The bad smell is from the pet factory, which is just [328 yards] from here and it is causing problems for monks and novices here," the abbot said. He said he plans to move to the forest to practice dharma once the temple is sold. "Temple for sale at low price. The stench from the pet food factory is unbearable," read signs posted around the area. Supoj Urjitsurakul, manager of the pet food factory, said a third odor control system is being added in an attempt to control the stench. "Monks from Wat Or Noi temple have visited the factory. I gave them a tour and showed them that we are really trying to improve things. I tried to contact the abbot but he was busy so he sent the monks instead," Supoj said.


*-- Police: Man called 911 10 times for rides --*
IMMOKALEE, Fla. - Authorities said a south Florida man was arrested for allegedly making 10 calls to 911 to ask for rides to Mexico and other places. The Collier County Sheriff's Office said Alvaro Francisco, 26, of Immokalee, first called 911 at 8:16 p.m. Saturday and made his final call at 12:45 a.m. Sunday, the Naples (Fla.) Daily News reported Monday. Deputies said Francisco asked for rides to Mexico, his friend's house and his boss' house. The man was advised during each call that his requests did not qualify as emergencies. Francisco, who deputies said smelled of alcohol, was arrested shortly after his final call on a misdemeanor charge of misuse of 911.


*-- READER COMMENTS --*
Hi Lewis, Did the knife, hammer, or homeless attacks result in 26 deaths in a matter of minutes? Didn't think so. -Take care, Jennifer
[No, they didn't. But senseless deaths like those won't be prevented until the real problems are addressed, and those problems are not the availability of high-capacity clips and rifles with pistol grip handles.]

The love story I heard of while I was volunteering in the Missouri prison system was the prison worker with 2 children left her husband for a prisoner. They ran away together to live on a farm. Later they found her and another woman in barrels. I guess true love means giving your lover her own barrel. -JJ
[At least he didn't shoot them.]

Hi Lewis, At least Maury Anderson had some respect for you, after all, he did call you "sir". Thanks for hearing me. -Elizabeth
[Usually when people call me Sir it is followed by, "You're causing a scene."]

Maybe you meant morals? But I find myself agreeing completely with out this time. I am very much a pro-gun person, with the only thing I support more might be my pro-personal-responsibility position - something else we are sadly lacking in society today.

Thank you. Your entire column made tons of sense. I'm in Wyoming. We just had some wacko kill his father (in front of his class at the university) after he had killed his father's girlfriend at the house--wait for it--WITH A BOW AND ARROW. No one was on tv hollering for banning archery.

The difference between the knife, hammer and homeless attacks are that a SINGLE person was injured by another single person. In the Newtown shootings, ONE person killed 20 people with a gun. It is ridiculous to compare because you cannot "reload" a knife or a hammer with multiple, semi-automatic hands in which to kill more people. -Julie Hansen
[Right you are. And not a single measure (that I have read) that has been proposed by the administration would have stopped the Newtown shooting.]

Hi Lewis, The Taliban and al Qaeda have a long way to go if they want to kill as many Americans as the Americans do. The US has turned into a third world country with good plumbing. Maybe we should change the name of the country to Bloodbathia. -Jody
[A third world country with good plumbing? Brilliant. Can I use that?]

sounds like back peddling to me!!! would you really want only the government and criminals to have guns? are you crazy???
[Nope! That is why I wrote 2 (or 3) issues ago that everyone would have to give them up, not just civilians. It is like last year's story about the police in New York (I believe it was) who were running guns to gang members. And how many innocent people are shot and killed by the police themselves? And if you are still wondering how criminals get guns just remember three words; Fast and Furious.]

*-- END OF READER COMMENTS --*
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