Saturday, February 16, 2013

Greetings fellow Bizarros:

There were some good bizarre stories this week. There was, of course, the Carnival cruise (or should I say 'crap') ship which was without power or toilets for five days while it was being towed back to port after an engine room fire. 4,200 people shitting in plastic bags for five days certainly puts that story in the bizarre category.

And how much more bizarre can you get than the meteor which exploded in the atmosphere above the Chelyabinsk region in Russia rocking buildings, shattering thousands of windows and injuring hundreds of people? And just to give it a cold war feel one paranoid Russian politician even said the event was not a meteor but a US weapons test.

But for my money (and since I'm the editor mine is the only money that counts) the best bizarre story of the week has to go to former San Diego mayor Maureen O'Connor who skimmed $2 million from a charity in order to help fund her one billion dollar gambling addiction.

Now ol' Maureen earned her initial fortune the old fashioned way; she married the multi-millionaire founder of Jack in the Box Burgers, who just happened to be 30 years her senior.

When her sugar-daddy went to that golden burger joint in the sky Maureen started gambling away his fortune. It wasn't all bad luck. At one point Maureen was reportedly up hundreds of millions of dollars, but apparently it wasn't enough. When she eventually gambled it all away she resorted to embezzling $2 million from her late husband's charitable foundation in an effort to win it back.

It wasn't successful.

Incredibly her lawyers have successfully used the old 'a brain tumor impaired my reasoning' defense (that's not a joke) in order to defer her prosecution for two years so she can raise the money to pay the charity back.

If that's not American justice, nothing is.

Bizarrely,
Lewis

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Questions? Comments? Email Lewis


*-- Chubby Checker suing HP over penis app --*
FORT PIERCE, Fla. - A Florida lawsuit filed on behalf of Chubby Checker accuses Hewlett-Packard and subsidiary Palm Inc. of using the singer's name to sell a penis-estimating app. Attorney Willie Gary filed the lawsuit Monday in a Fort Piece federal court alleging the company's Palm APP Catalog, which sells apps for Palm smartphones, sells an app called "The Chubby Checker" designed to estimate the size of a man's penis based on his shoe size, TCPalm.com reported Thursday. The lawsuit says the 71-year-old singer, whose real name is Ernest Evans, has a trademark on the name "Chubby Checker" for use in his business interests. "Defendants' use of the name 'Chubby Checker' in its app is likely to associate plaintiff's (trade) marks with the obscene, sexual connotation and images," the lawsuit states. TCPalm did not have a comment from Hewlett-Packard or Palm Inc.


*-- Topless activist bares chest after court --*
NEW YORK - A New York performance artist and activist for women's topless rights shed her shirt outside of the courthouse after having charges against her dismissed. Holly Van Voast, 46, who was arrested for trespassing, disorderly conduct and pot possession after she went topless inside St. Patrick's Cathedral Jan. 30 of last year, had the charges dismissed Wednesday and took off her shirt upon exiting the courthouse, the New York Daily News reported Thursday. Ron Kuby, Van Voast's lawyer, said the conditional dismissal also included two other shirtless arrests, one on the D train May 7 for occupying multiple seats and one June 7 on the L train for interfering with passenger movement, disorderly conduct and occupying multiple seats. The dismissal "covers all of Ms. Van Voast's outstanding busts," Kuby was quoted as saying. Van Vost, who had a drawn-on black mustache during Wednesday's court appearance, said she kept her breasts covered inside the courtroom because she's "not an exhibitionist." It is legal for women to go topless in New York City.


*-- READER COMMENTS --*
re: Susanne's suggestion for how the feds can save money on the drug war: I have a better suggestion, Lewis. They can save even more money by admitting defeat. Drugs have won, and to no longer wage war on them would save huge amounts of money. Plus they'd represent a new source of tax revenue. -Craig

Who the hell does Lisa from Tx think she is? Just because one person in a state does something stupid does not mean everyone from that state is stupid. I happen to live in Tenn. and have all my life. I have been to Texas and would ten times rather be in Tenn. where people are real. So she needs to keep her slurs about Tenn. to herself. -Hope, Tenn.

*-- END OF READER COMMENTS --*
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