Saturday, August 10, 2013

Greetings fellow Bizarros:

There is a lot to be said for honesty. A woman intent on getting breast implants is begging for money on the street with a sign that reads, "Not homeless, need boobs."

"I just want bigger boobs because I'm not happy with the ones that I have. I figured this was a good way to do it," Christina Andrews said. "People put out signs that they're homeless. I'm not, so I'm just being honest."

Andrews said she was unsure what type of reaction she would get, or if she would get any cash, but things appear to be working out. She not only has more money, she has gotten plenty of smiles as well, she says.

Bizarrely,
Lewis

Questions? Comments? Email Lewis


*-- London house collapses under weight of hoarder's junk --*
LONDON - Neighbors of a British hoarder said they feared her dead when 22 tons of junk collapsed her house but it turned out she wasn't home at the time. People living near the London home of Wendy Towers, 61, said they called authorities Tuesday when the 22 tons of junk Towers kept on the second floor of her home caused the house to cave in, the London Evening Standard reported Thursday. "We thought she was dead. We had not seen her for a week, and she was not the type to go on holiday," said Rozmin Najak, 26, who lives across the street. "The ceiling had collapsed, there were sniffer dogs here looking for her and we had all started to believe the worst had happened and we should have done more to check on her. I just couldn't believe it when she walked up the road." However, Najak and others said they were relieved when Towers arrived home from staying at a friend's house. "I had no idea that she was hoarding so much stuff. But I'm just glad she is okay," Najak said. Towers said she will treat the incident as a fresh beginning. "I'm okay. I will go and stay with some friends in Snaresbrook. It will be a new start," she said. London police and fire brigade officials confirmed they were called to the home Tuesday on a report of a person possibly being trapped in a collapsed home. "We were called out. We sent in a sniffer dog to try to establish whether anyone was in the house. There were no positive signs," a fire brigade spokesman said.


*-- Man completes 22-mile swim with 1 ton of bricks --*
DETROIT - A long distance swimmer has completed his 22-mile trip across a Michigan lake while towing a ton of bricks after more than 50 hours in the water. Jim Dreyer, 49, arrived at Detroit's Belle Island at 11:15 a.m. Wednesday after starting his Lake St. Clair swim at 8:36 a.m. Monday while towing two inflatable boats filled with a total 1 ton of bricks, Mlive.com reported Thursday. Dreyer, an experienced long-distance swimmer who has previously crossed Lake Superior, said his trip took about 21 hours longer than he expected because he drifted back some when he fell asleep and he spent some time lost. He made the swim without the help of a support boat. The swimmer said the bricks he towed across the lake will be auctioned off to benefit Habitat for Humanity.


*-- READER COMMENTS --*
Lewis, a "fatberg" like that is likely caused by people thinking they are the only ones dumping or flushing those things down the drain. I don't know about in England, but here in SoCal you can be fined for doing that. -Chris

Lewis, you are the cat's knees, the bees pajamas! Bizarre News is funnier then "Psycho", more chilling than "Jeeves Takes Charge," and shorter than "War And Peace." You put the silent "e" in "awesome." --Ken

Lewis, I hope you're making a lot of $. You bring a lot of fun into my life, Sugar. Thanks from a fan in California.
[Well, I don't keep stacks of twenty dollar bills under the sink in the bathroom, but I squeak by. Thanks for the kudos.]

*-- END OF READER COMMENTS --*
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Well, that is a wrap for Bizarre News. How did we do?
Send comments and questions to: LEWIS