Bizarre News - October 14, 2015

Greetings fellow Bizarros:

It's called the castle doctrine. It says that when a person is in his or her legal abode they have certain legal protections and immunities which permit them to use force, even deadly force, to defend themselves against an intruder.

And you better believe they take the castle doctrine seriously in Texas. Maybe a little too seriously, as in the case of this Texas man who got a little spooked when his wife came home early in the morning.

Police said the San Antonio man, whose name was not released, told them he heard some noises coming from the front of the house about 4 a.m. and saw a flash of light.

He grabbed a shotgun and went to investigate.

The man said he saw a light and someone standing at a distance, so before investigating any further, or trying to determine whether the 'flash of light' represented a threat or maybe a headlight or something, he fired a blast from the shotgun.

That's when he realized he had shot his wife.

Police tried to resuscitate her when they arrived, but she was pronounced dead at the scene from a gunshot wound to her chest.

Authorities aren't sure whether her husband will be charged in the fatal shooting, which remains under investigation.

Bizarrely,
Lewis

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*-- Florida man arrested for drunk driving blames dog --*
SARASOTA, Fla. - A Florida DWI suspect allegedly offered authorities an unusual explanation for his vehicle's erratic movements: "My dog was driving." The Manatee County Sheriff's Office said a deputy attempted a traffic stop shortly before 8 p.m. Oct. 7 on a white four-door vehicle seek speeding through a neighborhood. The sheriff's office said the vehicle sped up while attempting a turn and ended up traveling through a ditch on the side of the road. The driver then over-corrected, swerved and ended up going through a ditch on the opposite side of the road before crashing into a house, investigators said. The suspect, later identified as Reliford Cooper, fled on foot and a K9 unit soon found his t-shirt in front of a church. A pastor from the church told a deputy that someone was hiding in the facility's bathroom. Churchgoers forced Cooper out, and he was placed under arrest. "I wasn't driving that car." Cooper allegedly told deputies while he was being handcuffed. "Who was chasing me? You're slow as [expletive]!" A deputy told Cooper he smelled of alcohol and marijuana, leading him to allegedly offer an explanation for the events. "My dog was driving that car. I ran because I wanted to. You ain't gonna find no drugs or guns on me," Cooper allegedly said, before vomiting and complaining of a back injury. Cooper was arrested on charges including DWI with property damage, aggravated fleeing, leaving the scene of a crash with property damage and resisting/obstructing an officer without violence. He was taken to Manatee Memorial hospital for examination and later transported to jail.


*-- Florida woman accidentally super glued her eye shut --*
LANTANA, Fla. - A Florida woman said she mistook super glue for eye drops and ended up with her eye glued shut for several days. Katherine Gaydos said her ordeal began last week when a piece of debris flew into her eye while a friend was using a leaf blower. "Something blew into my eye and I screamed for someone else to get eye drops out of my purse and they brought super glue," she told WPBF-TV. "As soon as I felt it in my eye I felt it burn and I closed my eye and screamed 'Call 911.'" Gaydos said her doctor gave her antibiotic salve and ointment, but refused to attempt to open her eye or give further treatment unless she made a payment. "He was talking about doing surgery to try and save my eye, but now I don't know what to do -- I don't have a job, no insurance or any money," Gaydos said. Gaydos said another doctor contacted her after the initial WPBF-TV report aired Wednesday and was able to pry her eye open. "It was the same office, but a different doctor," Gaydos said. "He put Lidocaine above and below my eye and just pulled on it until it finally opened." Gaydos said the second doctor told her to return Friday to remove the rest of the glue from her cornea. She said the doctor did not ask her for payment. "He said I should get my sight back, and not have permanent damage," Gaydos said. Dr. Pankaj Gupta, assistant professor of ophthalmology at Case Western Reserve University in Cleveland, Ohio, said the situation would have resolved itself over time if Gaydos had not received treatment. "The first thing I think everyone needs to know is don't panic," Gupta told ABC News. "There is not a single thing that is permanent that will not slough off on its own," he said. "In time it will go away."


*-- READER COMMENTS --*
The lead story about the 800 pound man being in a hospital for 80 days while ordering pizza is a bit hard to figure. I mean, did no one see the pizza guy every day and the mountain of pizza boxes that an 800 pound man couldn't throw away. -Wes
[I don't know, I have seen pizza delivery guys get pretty creative for a good tip.]

E-cigs are vapor with nicotine in it. Nicotine is an insecticide. Thanks, but I don't want to inhale your leftover insecticide. -an Illinois breather.
[You'd rather eat it in your garden salad and sweet corn.]

Calling out the wrong name is exactly why I started using generic terms of endearment all the time. You don't do that twice...besides, when they hear 'oh god' men think you're calling them by name anyway.
[Sounds like you have a very healthy attitude toward sex and relationships.]

A little known fact about Lorena Bobbit's sister who also tried to copy Lorena's actions of cutting off her man's penis. The man realized what was about to happen and moved, ending up with a knife blade stuck in his leg. She was arrested and charged with a misdaweiner. -gene
[Have you been saving that joke since grammar school?]

*-- END OF READER COMMENTS --*
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