Saturday, May 14, 2011

Greetings fellow Bizarros:

It is actually nice to know that this won't work, even in Kentucky, although it took a Kentuckian to try it. It seems a 32-year-old man was arrested last weekend after trying to coerce a woman into his car by pretending he was a police officer. But not just any kind of police officer.

Mike Myers is accused of trying to convince a woman to get
in his Crown Victoria by allegedly telling her that he could give her a ride home because she had had too much to drink, according to the arrest report.

Two firefighters noticed the woman and Myers and asked Myers if he was an officer, to which Myers allegedly said yes and gave a badge number but not his name. Eventually, the fire-fighters called the police, suspecting that Myers was not an officer.

The report says that Myers consented to a search of his car, and that is when police found a silver badge that read 'Official Boob Inspector, Department of Titillation.' The arresting officer noted in the report that the badge did look official on first glance.

The woman told police that Myers did threaten her with jail if she didn't go with him...and a citation for improperly secured twins.

Bizarrely,

Lewis

P.S. Now You Can Follow BIZARRE NEWS on TWITTER: MyBizarreNews

+-- Even More Bizarre May Holidays --+
May 21 is National Memo Day & National Waitresses/Waiters Day
May 22 is Buy-A-Musical-Instrument Day
May 23 is Penny Day
May 24 is National Escargot Day
May 25 is National Tap Dance Day
May 26 is Grey Day
May 27 is Body Painting Arts Festival
May 28 is National Hamburger Day
May 29 is End Of The Middle Ages Day
May 30 is My Bucket's Got A Hole In It Day
May 31 is National Macaroon Day

--- Man appears at beach after 3 days on raft ---
WANTAGH, N.Y. - New York park police said a wetsuit-clad man who showed up at a beach after spending three days on a raft was arrested for criminal possession of a weapon. Gary Smith of Wantagh said he was at Jones Beach State Park at about 6:15 a.m. Tuesday when he spotted Pablo Perez, 47, wandering near the boardwalk, the New York Post reported Wednesday. "He was easily 6-3 and over 300 pounds," Smith said. "I asked him where he came from, and he said he'd been out on a raft for the last three days. He told me he was fishing and that his raft was tied to another boat and became detached and he drifted out to sea." Police said they cut a .25-caliber semiautomatic, which was loaded and unlicensed, out of Perez's wetsuit. He was arrested for criminal possession of a weapon and taken to a hospital to receive treatment for dehydration and exhaustion. Investigators found a 9-foot raft nearby where Perez was first spotted, police said. State Park Police Chief Richard O'Donnell said officers are still investigating the "very unusual incident."

--- NYC speed warnings will get ghoulish ---
NEW YORK - New York City is resorting to images of skeletons to scare drivers into obeying its 30 mph speed limit. The city Transportation Department announced Thursday it will put up speed boards -- the radar-equipped signs that tell drivers their speed -- this summer that will flash LED skeletons when they spot cars going over the limit, The New York Times reported. The skeleton is a bony incarnation of the pedestrian stick figure that flashes on crosswalk lights. A "That's Why It's 30" campaign on bus shelter ads and television spots already uses skeletons to warn that speeding endangers pedestrians. Mayor Michael Bloomberg likened the signs to cigarette packs overseas that sport skulls and crossbones to warn of cancer. "Unless you make it graphic, people don't get the message," he said.


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--- READER COMMENTS ---
Lewis, I read in the news today that police found an un-
identified man's body in a park in your area. They describe
him as having a Beer Belly, Saggy Balls, Wrinkly Ass and a
Small Dick. Are you okay?
[I don't have a wrinkly ass.]

Hey lewis-check out this bizarre story from Mexico... -Hiedi
"A Mexican donkey has been freed from jail after doing time
for acting like a jackass. The Televisa network showed Blacky
gobbling food from a bucket after spending three days in a
jail that normally holds people for public drunkenness and
other disturbances. Blacky was jailed for biting and kicking
two men near a ranch outside Tuxtla Gutierrez, the capital
of the southern state of Chiapas. Officials freed the donkey
after its owner paid a fine of $36 and the $115 hospital bill
of the men, who suffered bites to the chest and a broken
ankle."
[I put this in mostly because I love the name Hiedi.]

Lewis; once I got punched in the head during a fist fight
and I talked like Carl Spackler from Caddyshack for about a
week. Do you think that's the same thing as foreign accent
syndrome?
[Since 'Spackler' isn't a foreign language, I would have to
say no. But I'm no expert.]

--- END OF READER COMMENTS ---
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