You've seen them. You've sighed at them. You've probably even muttered something under your breath as they slowly reverse into a parking spot like they're performing brain surgery.

Yes, I'm talking about the Backer-Inners... that special breed of driver who believes pulling into a spot front first is for the weak-minded.

Now, I'm not sure if this whole "backing in" thing is an alpha move, a secret society ritual, or just a way to feel like they're in an action movie every time they park. But whatever it is, it's a spectacle.

Ask one of these folks why they do it, and they'll hit you with the classic line:

"It's easier to pull out when leaving."

Ah yes, the great time-saver! Because heaven forbid you waste three whole seconds backing out later - it's much better to block traffic for 45 seconds now while performing a slow-motion, multi-angle, three-camera maneuver worthy of the Fast & Furious franchise.

Watching a Backer-Inner in action is like watching an Olympic event. You've got the precision, the focus, the unnecessary drama. Somewhere, a judge from Finland is holding up a "9.6" for their mirror alignment.

And let's be honest - it's never smooth. There's always the slow creep back... the sudden stop... the pull forward to readjust... another slow creep back... another pull forward... and finally, the triumphant sigh when they nail it - slightly crooked and hugging the line.

Meanwhile, the rest of us are just trying to buy bread and maybe a rotisserie chicken before the store closes. But no, Commander Backup needs to complete his mission.

I genuinely believe this whole backing-in business is less about convenience and more about making a statement. It says, "I'm a planner. I think ahead. I have control over my destiny and this Toyota Tacoma."

But here's the kicker: when it's time to leave, that same person will sit in their car for five full minutes checking their phone, adjusting the radio, and contemplating the meaning of life. So much for that "quick getaway," huh?

And don't even get me started on the smug little smile they give when they pull out of their perfectly reversed spot later - straight ahead, like a boss, while the rest of us are still loading groceries.

Look, I respect the effort. Truly. But maybe, just maybe, we don't need to turn parking into an event with judges, commentary, and a highlight reel. Sometimes it's okay to just pull in, live your life, and not pretend you're docking the space shuttle.




Until then, I'll keep parking like a normal person - forward, quick, and with dignity - while the Backer-Inners continue chasing gold in the Parking Lot Olympics.

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Until next time -
Donny @ Gopher Update