November 02, 2024

Have A Laugh With Some Firearm Funnies

Firearms, for all their seriousness, have long inspired humor, sparking jokes that range from clever wordplay to classic "cowboy" humor and beyond. While gun jokes can be a polarizing topic, many enjoy the lighthearted take on firearm culture, safety mishaps, hunting tales, and quirky situations at the shooting range. From puns about bullet points to jokes on firearm maintenance, these jokes often offer a lighter look at the world of firearms, blending comedy with culture in a way that can be both entertaining and surprisingly insightful.

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What do you call a firearm made out of salt?

A salt rifle.

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My dad got in a HUGE fight with my mom. He accused her of smearing glue on his firearms. She denied it.

But he's sticking to his guns.

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A Little Old Lady is Pulled Over in Texas. When the Officer approaches the window, he shines a light into the car and sees that she has a little .22 caliber pistol in the coin tray under her dashboard.

The officer says: "Ma'am, would you please unload and hand me your firearm for the duration of this stop to ensure everyone's safety?"

The old lady replies: "Absolutely, officer. Here you go." and gently hands him the pistol.

The officer then says: "Ma'am, may I please have your license and registration?"

The old lady hands him her license but then pauses and says: "Before I open the glove box to get my registration, I should tell you I also keep a 9mm pistol in there as well."

The officer asks if his partner can retrieve the pistol from the glove box before she reaches in for the registration and the little old lady agrees again.

License and registration in hand, the officer turns to walk back to his cruiser. Two steps in, he turns around and walks back to the woman.

"Ma'am, may I ask if you have any more firearms in this vehicle today?"

The old lady replies: "Why yes, dear. I also have a .357 in the center console, and a 12 gauge shotgun under the passenger seat."

The officer looks at her shocked and asks: "Ma'am, what exactly are you so afraid of??"

The little old lady smiles and says: "With all of this? Not a goddamn thing!"

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Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms

It sounds more like the concept for an awesome store rather than a government agency.

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Why should you always keep a loaded firearm in the small room by your front door?

Foyer protection.

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I was going through airport security and I got asked "Do you have any firearms?"

Apparently, "What do you need?" wasn't the right answer.

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I saw a woman at the gas station pumping gas and trying to light a cigarette.

I went inside to pay and saw two policemen in the store. I said "Did you guys see that woman out there?" They looked outside and suddenly darted out the door. I turn and see she caught her arm on fire.

The policemen threw a blanket around her and wrestled her to the ground and put out the fire. Then they gave her a ticket!

After they came inside I asked why they gave her a ticket. Turns out that firearm wasn't registered.