March 28, 2024

Sold out to whomever!

I once toured the United States Senate Chamber. You know what was weird? In front of each chair was the same book: 'Chicken Soup for When You've Sold Your Soul.'



"Somebody actually did a study that found that because of his hard-drinking lifestyle, the character James Bond would live to be only 56 years old. When men heard that they were like, 'Yeah, I'd take that deal.'" -Jimmy Fallon



The Pope was finishing his sermon. He ended it with the Latin phrase, "Tuti homini" - Blessed be mankind.

A women's rights group approached the pope the next day. They noticed that the pope had blessed all of mankind, but not womankind. So the next day, after his sermon, the pope concluded by saying, "Tuti homini, et tuti femini" - Blessed be mankind and womankind.

The next day, a gay-rights group approached the pope. They said that they noticed that he had blessed mankind and womankind, and asked if he could also bless those who are gay.

The pope said, "Sure."

The next day, the pope concluded his sermon with, "Tuti homeni, et tuti femini, et tuti fruiti."