January 21, 2023

Greetings fellow Bizarros:

A man told his aunt that he stole a human brain in order to use it to produce strong marijuana that causes hallucinations, according to police in Pennsylvania.

Carlisle police said that they have arrested 26-year-old Joshua Long, after being accused of conspiring with his friends to produce potent marijuana using the stolen human brain.

Not sure how that would work, but you can't argue with science.

Long was charged with abuse of a corpse and conspiracy to commit abuse of a corpse. He was booked into the Cumberland County Prison, and his bail was set at $100,000.

Police are still looking for Long's accomplices.

According to the police investigation, Long's aunt discovered the human brain in a WalMart shopping bag under the porch of a mobile home belonging to his friend.

When the aunt asked Long about the brain, he admitted that he and Zoller use it to produce strong marijuana. Police believe that the brain was used as a specimen for teaching.

Bizarrely,
Lewis

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Questions? Comments? Email: lewis@gopher-news.com

It Seemed Like a Good Idea at the Time

Authorities in Missouri arrested a man and a woman accused of taking a naked ride on a stolen lawn mower in the early morning. The Jasper County Sheriff's Office said deputies made contact with a 55-year-old man and a 40-year-old woman inside the house. The couple told deputies they had been skinny dipping in a creek earlier that morning and they rode the lawn mower home in the nude after their clothes were stolen. Deputies said the couple were arrested on suspicion of stealing when deputies determined the lawn mower didn't belong to either of them. The sheriff's office said theft charges are being pursued by the Jasper County prosecutor's office.

When Dinner Comes to Your Door

Residents of a Baltimore apartment complex received a visit from a pair of bulls that escaped from a local slaughterhouse on Friday morning. The bulls escaped from the Old Line Custom Meat Company and found their way into the parking lot of a nearby apartment complex around 7 a.m. Baltimore police arrived on the scene and used portable gates along with the complex's "natural barriers" to temporarily trap the bulls. "They were able to get some fencing over here to fence them in and we had them contained," Baltimore Police spokesman reported. "However, the bulls knocked over the fencing a couple of times, so we had to move people back." The bulls were finally captured by about 10:30 a.m., before temperatures reached nearly 100 degrees. No one was hurt in the incident.