June 22, 2022
Good Morning Groanies,
Why does it have to be so hot? I don't remember it ever being this hot last summer, do you? People that say that they'd rather be hot than cold are just plain nuts!
It's so hot that I'm starting to sweat while inside of buildings with air conditioning. It's so hot I'm sweating when I think about sweating. It's so hot my sweat sweats.
This heat is really starting to get to me. I'm feeling crabby, uncomfortable, tired, upset, uneasy, worrisome, angry, bewildered, befuddled, sticky, distracted, unicorn, beef, stapler, wedding ring, sloppy joe, hat trick, wing, butterscotch, biscuit, muffler, coffee, cheese-puppet, chalk-mask, mailbox, wizardry, bottlecap, nose-hair, Kenny Rogers, hickory, bacon, speed-bag, sandwich, webbing, puppy, boner, leg, Alf, tower, button...
What happened?! I think this heat is really starting to get to me.
Jokes? Questions? Comments? Email Steve
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*-- Good Grief --*
A man placed some flowers on the grave of his dearly departed mother and started back toward his car when his attention was diverted to another man kneeling at a grave.
The man seemed to be praying with profound intensity and kept repeating, "Why did you have to die? Why did you have to die?"
The first man approached him and said, "Sir, I don't wish to interfere with your private grief, but this demonstration of pain is more than I've ever seen before. For whom do you mourn so deeply? A child? A parent?"
The mourner took a moment to collect himself, then replied, "My wife's first husband."
*-- Old Snake at the Doctor --*
A old snake goes to see his Doctor.
"Doc, I need something for my eyes... can't see well these days". The Doc fixes him up with a pair of glasses and tells him to return in 2 weeks.
The snake comes back in 2 weeks and tells the doctor he's very depressed.
Doc says, "What's the problem... didn't the glasses help you?"
"The glasses are fine doc, I just discovered I've been living with a water hose the past 2 years!"
*-- Q and A Quickies --*
Q: Who does the ocean date?
A: It goes out with the tide.
Q: What do you get if you cross two punsters with a hen?
A: Two comedians who lay eggs with a lot of bad yolks.
Q: What did the boy say after his math teacher assigned four pages of homework.
A: Boy, do I have problems.