December 08, 2021

Good Morning Groanies,

Good news, all! I just finished my Christmas shopping. It was quite an ordeal, but I persevered.

Every year it seems to get harder and harder to get my shopping done. The roads are always clogged with traffic. Shoppers at the check out lanes are lined up to the back of the store. Shoppers walk aimlessly through aisle after aisle with no particular shopping agenda like a zombie in a George A. Romero movie. It seems like those shoppers with a plan are left alone to struggle for survival... or to stay home and use the internets. Much like Gloria Gaynor, I kept belting out, "I Will Survive"...and I did. I survived.

It was rough, but I got everything I needed to get, for the most part. Grandma, sorry, but they ran out of cat food and Poligrip. However, they did have that mustache trimmer you wanted.

Groaningly yours,
Steve

Jokes? Questions? Comments? Email Steve

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*-- Q and A Quickies --*

Q: What do you call a laptop growing on your Christmas tree?

A: A pineapple.


Q: What do you call a scary looking reindeer?

A: A cari-boo!


Q: How do you know when Santa's around?

A: You can always sense his presents.

*-- More Q and A Quickies --*

Q: What's every parent's favorite Christmas Carol?

A: Silent Night.


Q: Why was the little boy so cold on Christmas morning?

A: Because it was Decembrrrrr!


Q: What does an elf study in school?

A: The elf-abet.

*-- Even More Q and A Quickies --*

Q: Why does Santa have three gardens?

A: So he can ho ho ho.


Q: What nationality is Santa Claus?

A: North Polish.


Q: What do you call a snowman with a six pack?

A: An abdominal snowman.