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February 24, 2020

Good morning crew,

I was fighting it for quite a while, but it finally caught up with me. Some nasty, upper respiratory bug has taken up residence in my sinuses and just ruined my weekend. It was the first weekend in a month that the wife and I both had off too, and she was really looking forward to relaxing and having a little fun together. But what she got to do was listen to me sniffle and sneeze for 48 hours while I sat on the sofa in my bath robe and drank hot tea and whiskey (for medicinal purposes).

It was my own fault, I guess. Weeks ago I started being pestered by a little sniffle, but since I was still able to work, and go to classes, and put in 12 hour days I figured it would just go away. It didn't. If I had just taken a day or two off and gotten some rest three weeks ago, my head wouldn't feel like a 5 pound sack of wet oatmeal today.

Ah well, we're always invincible until we're not, right?

Laugh it up,

Joe

joe@gophercentral.com

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Anybody who says their wedding or the birth of their child was the best day of their life has clearly never had 2 candy bars fall down at once from a vending machine.

***

My friend keeps telling me, "Cheer up, man. It could be worse. You could be stuck underground in a hole full of water." And I know he means well, but...

***

I hope when I die it's early in the morning, so I don't go to work that day for no reason.

***

A woman said to her friend, "I don't know what to do. My husband is such a mess maker that you can't imagine. He doesn't put anything in its place, I am always going around the house organizing things."

The friend says, "Take a tip from me. The first week after we were married I told my husband firmly, 'Every glass and plate that you take, wash when you are done and put back in its place.'"

The first woman asked, "Did it help?"

Her friend said, "I don't know. I haven't seen him since."

Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes

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Everyone thought the idea over for a minute, and then a voice of reason replied, "Are you sure you want your business card to read 'Imagination, Limited'?"