August 22, 2019
Greetings Laff Lovers,
I was walking through the office to get some water and made a few poor attempts at clean humor with the girls in the office who are under 30.
When I got to the side that has mostly 45 and older women I made my normal, sexist, offensive, non-politically correct comments.
One of the women over 50 stopped me, "TZ, we've noticed that on that side of the room you're all clean and nice and gentlemanly, but over here you don't pretend. You are the pig that we all know you are. What gives?"
"Well," I reflected, "over there they are in the 'Me Too' movement and I'm one bad joke away from having my picture on the news. Over here," and I gestured to all of them, "you are in the 'Why Not Me' movement. So I figure I'm safe."
Wisely,
TZ
Send me comments, jokes and pictures of all the hot women in your family at this link:
tz@gophercentral.com
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"According to research, sex during pregnancy is always safe unless your wife comes home and catches you." -Conan O'Brien
A mother in law said to her son's wife when their baby was born: "I don't mean to be rude but he doesn't look anything like my son."
The daughter-in-law lifted her skirt and said: "I don't mean to be rude either, but this is a pussy...not a fucking photo-copier."
Call a girl beautiful 1,000 times and she'll never notice.
Call a girl fat once and she'll never forget it.
That's because elephants never forget.
A couple, both age 68, went to a sex therapist's office. The doctor asked, "What can I do for you?" The man said, "Will you watch us have sexual intercourse?" The doctor looked puzzled, but agreed.
When the couple finished, the doctor said, "There's nothing wrong with the way you have intercourse," and charged them $50.
This happened several weeks in a row. The couple would make an appointment, have intercourse with no problems, pay the doctor, then leave.
Finally the doctor asked, "Just exactly what are you trying to find out?"
The old man said, "We're not trying to find out anything. She's married and we can't go to her house. I'm married and we can't go to my house. The Holiday Inn charges $90. The Hilton charges $108. We do it here for $50, and I get $43 back from Medicare."
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