June 23, 2019

Greetings Laff Lovers,

Years ago my wife and I used to share those sweaty, outdoor summer chores until she ran over the garden hose with the lawn mower. Twice. After that I did the job myself until the kids started to get old enough to mow the lawn and run over the garden hose. I really don't know why it's so hard to roll the damn thing up before you start mowing, but I must have replaced five garden hoses in the last ten years.

And after all that time, all that money, and all that annoyance, now, NOW is when they come out with the practically indestructible Hose Hero.

Talk about smart engineering; what you have is a rubber inner hose surrounded by a SmartSteel outer sheath that holds up to anything the outdoors has to throw at it. It's lightweight, flexible, it doesn't kink; in fact, it hardly tangles, and the SmartSteel shell is virtually indestructible. Seriously, watch the video here.

Each hose is 25 ft., but obviously you can link them together, so you get a BIG discount when you buy two, and 50 feet of hose is plenty for most yards.

With everything the Hose Hero offers this is a great deal, but there is one more reason I'm particularly fond of this product. It just so happens 'Hose Hero' was my nickname in college.

Click here to get all the details, watch the video, or to order yours.

Heroically,

TZ

Send me comments, jokes and pictures of all the hot women in your family at this link: tz@gophercentral.com

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"The only gracious way to accept an insult is to ignore it; if you can't ignore it, top it; if you can't top it, laugh at it; if you can't laugh at it, it's probably deserved." --Russell Lynes



Two elderly residents, a man and a woman, were alone in the lounge of their nursing home one evening. The old man looked over and said to the old lady, "I know just what you're wanting. For $5.00 I'll have sex with you right over there in that rocking chair."

The old lady looked surprised but didn't say a word.

The old man continued, "For $10.00 I'll do it with you on that nice soft sofa over there, but for $20.00, I'll take you back to my room, light some candles, and give you the most romantic evening you've had in 20 years."

The old lady still says nothing but after a couple of minutes, starts digging down in her purse. She pulls out a wrinkled $20.00 bill and holds it up.

"So you want the nice romantic evening in my room?" says the old man.

"Get serious," she replies. "Four times in the rocking chair!"



"A new book about why women have sex claims that women's reasons differ from pleasure to obligation to even 'feeling sorry for the guy.' After hearing this, men everywhere said, 'Whatever...'" -Conan O'Brien

One day Steve's mom was cleaning his room. In the closet, she found a bondage S&M magazine.

This was highly upsetting to her.

She hid the magazine until his father got home.

When Steve's father walked in the door, she irately handed the magazine to him, and said, "THIS is what I found in your son's closet."

He looked at it and handed it back to her without a word.

After an uncomfortable minute of silence she finally asked him, "Well, what should we do about this?"

Dad looked at her and said, "Well I DON'T think we should spank him."