Subscibe to DEAL OF THE DAY

May 29, 2019

Good Morning Groanies,

Ten years ago, I married the most wonderful woman ever! Sorry, folks. I saw her first!

That's right, it's our tenth wedding anniversary for Stacy and me. Stacy or I? Or us? Let's just go with we.

I still can't get over the fact that we've been married for ten years. I guess time does fly when you're having fun. And what an incredibly fun, exciting, challenging, silly, sappy, tough, scary, exhilarating, monumental, thrilling, exhausting, sexy, awesome, extraordinary, fantastic time it has been. I wouldn't change a thing and I'd do it all over again in a heartbeat.

Stacy is the kind of person that drives you crazy in every way you can be driven crazy - and I love it! I don't know what I would do without her. She's kind of perfect for me. She gets me, as goofy and weird as I am, she gets me. And that's all I ever wanted. And that's really what it's all about. Finding that one that gets you. Good and bad. Up and down. Inside and out. Flame-kissed or Cajun style. I love her so much because she gets me and I know she loves me because I get her. It's as simple as that and that is exactly what means the very most.

I love you, Stacy. Happy Anniversary! Ten years and counting and no signs of ever slowing down.

Groaningly yours,

Jokes? Comments? Questions? Email Steve

*-- Naked for Breakfast --*

An old couple celebrates their 50th wedding anniversary in their home.

"Just think," the old man says, "we were sitting here at this same breakfast table, naked as jaybirds, 50 years ago."

"Well," the old lady snickers, "what do you say, should we get naked?"

The two immediately strip to the buff and sit back down at the table.

"You know, honey," the little old lady says slyly, "My breasts burn for you now as they did 50 years ago."

"I'm not surprised," replies the old man. "One's in your coffee and the other is in your oatmeal!"

*-- A Gift in the Driveway --*

Rick was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary.

His wife was really angry and told him, "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in less than 10 seconds, and it better be there!"

The next morning Rick got up early and left for work. When his wife woke up she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway.

Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, and brought the box back into the house.

She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale.

Rick has been missing since Friday.

*-- Q and A Quickies --*

Gadgets2Q: What's the difference between in-laws and outlaws?

A: Outlaws are WANTED!

Q: What's the difference between love and marriage?

A: Love is blind and marriage is an eye-opener!

Q: If love is "grand," what is divorce?

A: A hundred grand, or more.