May 15, 2019

Good Morning Groanies,

Well, now I'm rested and refreshed and ready to report on the weekend festivities. Brace yourselves!

As I mentioned in our last issue, which you can refer back to with a simple click right here, if it would tickle your fancy, Saturday was Jack's 7th birthday and Sunday was Mother's Day to all the ladies that had buns in the oven.

To celebrate his birthday, Jack wanted to go and partake in some miniature golf, but of course Mother Nature was in a mood because it wasn't Sunday yet and it rained cats and dogs. No problem! We found an indoor mini golf joint called Space Golf that was only a hop, skip, and a jump away. It was a blast! There were flying saucers, aliens, Godzilla was there, so was Darth Vader, and E.T. was taking care of a potted plant for some reason. Out of the 18 holes we played Jack had 5 or 6 holes in one. He kicked our butts! I should have known my 7-year-old was a putter pro...he brought his caddy with him.

Now Sunday was Mother's Day and I don't really have a funny story or anything, but I did want to say that my boys have the best mom ever! Stacy should be teaching a class on how to be a super-mom every single day from the birth of your child through each day that follows. She has a 7-year awesome streak the started the day before Mother's Day. I love her so much and wish that my fathering could be half as sweet, kind, and wonderful as she is with those boys of ours. I love you, Moe! And thank you for being amazing. Happy Mother's Day!

And for that lady that I call Mom, she has been the best mom, period. No matter what, no matter when or where, she's always been there. And I am forever grateful. It hasn't been easy for her over the last year. She lost her husband, my dad, to cancer in January and it's been rough for her. It's not easy for anyone to deal with a loss like that. That's why I have been and will continue to be there for her like she has been for me since she brought me into the world - no matter what. Dad told me to take care of Mom when he was gone and I told him that he had nothing to worry about because I was going to give her generous nature, love, and support a serious run for its money. I love you, Mom! And I'm always here no matter what. Happy Mother's Day!

Sorry for all of the heavy seriousness today. I just needed to get all of that out. Thanks for hearing or reading me out.

Oh, yeah! Here's something funny that happened on Sunday. How could I have forgotten? Sean stuck flowers in his pants and danced around. Hilarious! You should have seen it. That kid has got a future.

Groaningly yours,
Steve

P.S. Did you miss an issue? You can read every issue from the Gophercentral library of newsletters on our exhaustive archives page. Thousands of issues, all of your favorite publications in chronological order. You can read AND comment. Just click GopherArchives

Jokes? Comments? Questions? Email Steve

*-- I'll Have A Double --*

A guy walked into a bar and ordered a double.

The bartender brought out a guy who looked just like him.

*-- What Seems to be the Trouble? --*

Doctor: What seems to be the trouble?

Patient: Doctor, I keep getting the feeling that nobody can hear what I say.

Doctor: What seems to be the trouble?

*-- Q and A Quickies --*

Q: Why are teddy bears never hungry?

A: Because they are always stuffed!


Q: What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

A: Wet feet!


Q: What do you do when two snails have a fight?

A: Leave them to slug it out!