Subscribe to CLEAN LAFFS
Subscibe to DEAL OF THE DAY

April 29, 2019

Good morning crew,

Sale 99centThe basement in the house is a real 'man cave' now. The wife bought me a dartboard and we installed it this weekend.

I have wanted to hang a dartboard down there for a couple years now, but believe it or not, I have had trouble finding anyplace local to me that sells the good, quality, tournament style boards. You can find the cork boards anywhere, but nobody retail seems to carry the good ones. The wife finally took the buying decision out of my hands and ordered one online. It arrived in two days.

It came with one of those fancy cabinets that must be mounted on the wall, so after drinking several beers Saturday afternoon we made a number of careful measurements and drilled the guide holes into the wall.

Since we completely missed the stud we tried to sober up a little bit and made some more careful measurements. The cabinet is heavy and really needs to be mounted properly. After about 10 holes (which are thankfully covered by the cabinet itself) we finally got the thing mounted and the board hung. It looks pretty cool down there.

I gave the wife a quick tutorial on the game of Cricket and we played our inaugural game.

The very first dart thrown, the wife embedded up to the barrel into the drywall. Which was pretty impressive since she had to miss not only the dartboard, but the entire cabinet as well.

I'm starting to think I should have installed it in the garage.

Laugh it up,


P.S. Did you miss an issue? You can read every issue from the Gophercentral library of newsletters on our exhaustive archives page. Thousands of issues, all of your favorite publications in chronological order. You can read AND comment. Just click GopherArchives

Too Much Pet Hair Or Lint? Our 5-Star Fur Wizard Is Just $7.99 PLUS Get a Free Travel Version!

"I read that after the success of their in-store cafes, Ikea might open its own restaurants. Which is great, until you have to assemble your own table." -Jimmy Fallon


"An archaeologist is claiming he has discovered an amazing lost city in Kansas. Then he realized he just got drunk and watched 'The Wizard of Oz.'" -Conan O'Brien


"A woman in the U.K. held a wedding ceremony to marry herself. I don't know how to tell you this, but I think that lady you just married might be crazy." -Seth Meyers

LIMITED SUPPLY! Have Peace Of Mind On Every Road Trip With The ALL-IN-ONE Portable Power Station. Now Available For An Unbeatable Price!

Also known as 'women's intuition,' this sixth sense thing is no myth. Women seem to know what's going on in their man's lives almost better than they do.

Why is this?

In the early 80's researchers discovered that women have more connections between the brain's two hemispheres than men do. It's these connections that allow them to put together a puzzle from seemingly unconnectable pieces...

That, and they go through your stuff while you're in the shower.

Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes

After their expulsion from paradise, Adam was walking with his sons Cain and Abel.

As they passed by the ruins of the Garden of Eden, one of the boys asked, "Father, what's that?"

Adam replied, "Boys, that's where your mother ate us out of house and home."