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April 27, 2019

Greetings fellow Bizarros:

Kitchen 2019It's the scourge of the 21st century. Millions have become addicted, it has ruined relationships, warped minds, isolated people, caused widespread depression and dissatisfaction, and turned innocent people into deviants. I'm talking about porn, of course, and while many of these consequences are arguably true, today's story might be the first ever recorded case of killer porn.

Patricia Hill, 69, is on trial in Arkansas, accused of murdering her 65-year-old husband Frank Hill at their home in Pine Bluff last July. The woman allegedly flew into rage when she caught her husband watching porn after he promised to stop.

Patricia reportedly confronted him after seeing their satellite TV bill which showed he had signed back into his Dish channel after she had previously cancelled it.

Patricia then took Frank's love of porn as a "personal affront to her and her God" attorney Bill James said. "She told him over and over again to stop, and he said he would but went right back to doing it... she lost her mind."

During the ordeal, the 69-year-old reportedly grabbed a gun. She then went to his shed and shot his leg twice. After shooting her husband, Patricia allegedly went back inside her house to call the police as well as an ambulance.

Frank was found in a shed with a gunshot wound to the upper and lower body. He was rushed to hospital and subsequently pronounced dead.


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Murder Bird For Sale: Good Price

A giant, flightless bird that attacked and killed a man in Florida is up for sale. About 100 other exotic animals that once belonged to Marvin Hajos are being sold at an auction according to an announcement from the Gulf Coast Livestock Auction. Hajos, 75, was attacked after falling on a path near the enclosure of his two cassowaries, a type of flightless bird. Paramedics transported him to the hospital where he died of his injuries, according to police. Cassowaries are similar to emus and stand up to 6 feet tall and weigh up to 130 pounds, with black body feathers and bright blue heads and necks. The San Diego Zoo's website calls cassowaries the world's most dangerous bird with a 4-inch, dagger-like claw on each foot. The perfect pet. "The cassowary can slice open any predator or potential threat with a single swift kick. Powerful legs help the cassowary run up to 31 miles per hour through the dense forest underbrush," the website says. It's unclear which of the two birds attacked Hajos, but both are up for sale.

Man Swims 361 Miles

A South African man set a Guinness World Record when he spent 54 days swimming the full 361-mile length of Lake Malawi. Martin Hobbs, who took up swimming six years ago after a back injury ended his off-road biking and marathon running careers, became the first person to swim the entire length of Lake Malawi and captured the Guinness World Record for longest swim in a lake. "I've always wanted to do an African adventure and never got around to it," Hobbs said. "I didn't want to be buried one day and be known as the guy who worked very hard and that's it. It's nice to leave a legacy behind." The lake is known to be home to hazards including hippos and crocodiles. "It was the longest straight line of water that I could find," Hobbs said. "But I'm not going to lie, I'm terrified of the crocodiles." Hobbs, who said he averaged about 7 miles per day, used his accomplishment to raise funds for the Smile Foundation.


They should've made the panty thief wear a pair to jail.
[Would have made him very popular.]

You kind of have to assume the Easter Bunny was drunk at the time of the assault. My question is, how do you drink while wearing that giant bunny head?