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April 22, 2019

Good Morning Groanies,

I've always thought of age as a just number that was until I sneezed so hard my back went out...but then it brought some Chinese food home.

Age is a funny thing. We all have one, and just because we get older doesn't mean that we can't be fun and live life to the fullest!

We're launching a brand-new newsletter called Third Age!

If you're in your 40's, 50's or beyond then this newsletter is for you! Being in the third age means FREEDOM! You've experienced much and now it's time to celebrate our age.

Third Age is the new weekly newsletter that will share tips, stories and more... all with the theme, Embrace Your Age!

The best part is it's FREE! All of us here at Gophercentral would like you welcome you to Third Age! Click Here and Subscribe to Third Age Today! The premiere issue will be mailing very soon!

Now, here are a few jokes courtesy of the best folks that I know...you readers.

From Steve B.

Q: If a blind dinossurs is a Doyouthinkhesaurus, what do you call a blind dinosaur's dog?

A: Do-you-thin-he-saurus Rex...


From Kris S.

Q: Why did the donut visit the dentist?

A: To get a new filling.

Q: Why should you never iron a 4-leaf clover?

A: You don't want to press your luck.


Thanks for all the jokes, gang! Your humorous contributions are always welcome.

Groaningly yours,
Steve


P.S. Did you miss an issue? You can read every issue from the Gophercentral library of newsletters on our exhaustive archives page. Thousands of issues, all of your favorite publications in chronological order. You can read AND comment. Just click GopherArchives

Jokes? Comments? Questions? Email Steve



*-- Take Him to the Zoo --*

Once upon a time, there was a policeman that saw a man sitting in a car with a tiger sitting next to him. The police officer said, "It's against the law to have a tiger in your car. Take him to the zoo."

The next day the police officer saw the same man in the same car with the same tiger. The police officer said, "I thought I told you to take that tiger to the zoo."

The man replied, "I did. He liked it. Now we're going to the beach."

*-- The Worst Book Ever! --*

Gadgets2A blonde stormed up to the front desk of the library and said, "I have a complaint!"

"Yes, Ma'am?" said the librarian looking up at her.

"I borrowed a book last week and it was horrible!"

Puzzled by her complain the librarian asked, "What was wrong with it?"

"It had way too many characters and there was no plot whatsoever!" said the blonde.

The librarian nodded and said, "Ahhh. So you must be the person who took our phone book."

*-- Q and A Quickies --*

Q: Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

A: At forks in the road.


Q: What kind of phones do people in jail use?

A: Cell phones.


Q: What did the dolphin say when he bumped into the whale?

A: I didn't do it on porpoise.