Subscibe to DEAL OF THE DAY

April 17, 2019

Good Morning Groanies,

Stacy's car was in dire need of some maintenance. So, I took it to the repair shop for a little TLC.

While I was waiting for the work to be done, I noticed in the waiting area that a scruffy, middle-aged man was also waiting. At first glance, he looked like any other frustrated waiting room occupant, but there was something unique about him. While he paced back and forth for several minutes, I saw that his pants were unzipped and his belt unbuckled.

I wasn't sure if I was actually seeing this or if I was loopy from the overpowering smell of grease, motor oil, and gasoline in the air. All I do know is Stacy's car is running like a champ and from the appearance of the aforementioned gentlemen, his mechanic was arguably "full-service".

Groaningly yours,

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Turn Your Backyard into a Tropical Paradise! Get the Solar-Powered Torches Before They're Gone

*-- Once A Lawyer... --*

Two attorneys were walking out of a bar and a beautiful woman walks by.

One attorney turns to his associate and comments, "Boy, would I like to screw her!"

The other attorney thinks for a second and said, "Out of what?"

*-- Now That's Really Sick --*

An employee who had a terrible history for taking time off phoned in again one Monday morning: "I'm sorry, but I'll not be able to come in today as I'm too sick."

On hearing this his exasperated boss could barely conceal his anger and retorted in a rage: "Well, just how sick are you?"

"Well" the employee sighed, "I'm in bed with my sister!"

*-- Q and A Quickies --*

Kitchen 2019Q: Why does the sky cry?

A: Because it's blue.

Q: Who earns a living driving customers away?

A: A taxi driver.

Q: How is a drama teacher like an obsolete form of public transportation?

A: They are both stage coaches.