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April 15, 2019

Good Morning Groanies,

I love lists. Lists are truly the best. Lists would be listed on a list of the best things ever listed. Okay, here's a list of things that just popped into my head.

The Ten Weirdest Movie Titles That Ever Titled A Movie!

1. Bela Lugosi Meets a Brooklyn Gorilla
2. They Saved Hitler's Brain
3. The Ghost in the Invisible Bikini
4. Hollywood Chainsaw Hookers
5. Dirty Dingus Magee
6. Chopping Mall
7. Surf Nazis Must Die
8. Gas! -Or- It Became Necessary to Destroy the World in Order to Save It
9. The Thing with Two Heads
10. Santa Claus Conquers the Martians

Not bad, eh? I should make a list of all of the lists I've put in this newsletter. No, maybe a list of the things I was going to do but then didn't. Now, that's a list! Lists!!!

Groaningly yours,
Steve


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Jokes? Comments? Questions? Email Steve



*-- What's The Story? --*

A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells the mechanic it died. After he works on it for a few minutes, it is idling smoothly.

She says, "What's the story?"

He replies, "Just crap in the carburetor..."

She asks, "How often do I have to do that?"

*-- Sitting For Too Long --*

Two old ladies are sitting on a hard park bench for a few hours. One says: "I think my butt feel asleep."

The other said: "Yeah, I heard it snore a couple of times."

*-- Q and A Quickies --*

New GadgetsQ: Which knight is never killed in battle?

A: Sir Vivor.


Q: Which knight is always sleeping?

A: Sir Lumber.


Q: What was the knight's name that sat at the round table?

A: Sir Cumference.