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March 27, 2019

Greetings fellow Bizarros:

It's the oldest trick in the book. A cop fakes emergency calls so he can have sex with his girlfriend in his squad car without his wife finding out about it.

Okay, maybe not THE oldest.

A Florida police officer in is under fire after starting an affair with a woman online. Officer Kevin Thompson of Lady Lake, resigned after pictures surfaced, showing him pleasuring himself in his patrol car while he was in uniform.

Thompson, who is married, responded to the personal ad of the 38-year-old woman about four months ago, and the two began meeting while the officer was on duty.

Thompson allegedly put out false patrol alerts so that he could hang out with the woman while on duty.

Lost a ring down the drain? Take a look with the Lizard Cam. Look down drains, behind cabinets and inside walls. Nothing is ever lost again with the Lizard Cam. Just like the spy movies.

During one of the visits, the woman came to his patrol car and saw the officer pleasuring himself while holding a pair of her underwear.

She told police that she took about 15 photos of the officer's actions. That was his big mistake. Never let your girlfriend take photos of you jerking off while wearing her panties. Even civilians know what one.

The woman told deputies that she did not know that Thompson was married when the affair began. When she learned that he had a wife, the officer promised to leave his wife and live with her, according to police. That did not happen.

After he tried to break up with her, the woman told officers that she threatened to tell Thompson's wife about the affair and to show her the pictures of him pleasuring himself in his car.

Thompson then sent her threatening texts messages, saying that if she did so, he will see to it that her daughters are taken away from her and she will be arrested for threatening a police officer, according to the police report.

Thompson resigned the day after the allegations were made public.


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Meteor or UFO?

100 Shopping SpreeA seeming fireball in the sky over Los Angeles sparked reports of a possible meteor, but turned out to be a Red Bull wingsuit stunt. The streak in the sky over the city's downtown Wednesday night led to multiple reports of a possible meteor in the city, but the Los Angeles Police Department tweeted the scene was a stunt for a film shoot. Closer video shows two wingsuit flyers shooting off sparks behind them as they streak through the sky. Red Bull confirmed two wingsuit flyers were out over downtown Los Angeles as part of a video shoot timed to coincide with the supermoon.

Minnesota Man Takes Bus to Work

A man was arrested on a charge of theft after allegedly stealing a public transportation bus because he wanted to get to work, police in Minnesota said. The Hennepin County Sheriff's Office said that they have arrested 31-year-old Gregory John Jennrich, after being accused of taking the Metro Transit bus that was parked at a gas station and driving it to work. Jennrich was charged with theft. If convicted, he faces up to five years in prison and a fine of up to $10,000. According to the police investigation, the operator of the bus was on a break at the Holiday gas station, when the bus was stolen.


I believe Nature was trying to do us all a favor putting those beers out in a field.
[The beer has always been 'out in the field'. All we ever had to do was harvest it, mash it, boil it and ferment it. God helps those who help themselves.]

I guess they don't have those warnings in Colombia, you know, if you have an erection for more than an hour call a doctor?
[But it was 'The Beast' who needed a doctor, not her boyfriend.]

Sure, bringing a 1,600 steer into Petco on a leash is a little odd, but BIZARRE would be some leather-wearing dominatrix bringing a subby into Petco on a leash.
[Sounds like somebody's got a new fantasy.]