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February 27, 2019

Good Morning Groanies,

GadgetsBy now I'm sure you're tired of me complaining about the endless bitter cold winter weather, but I'm not stopping until spring has sprung.

Since winter reared its big frozen butt, what seems like forever ago, we've had to deal with several feet of snow, record freezing temperatures, frozen pipes, bursting pipes, bag pipes, dead car batteries, and winds so fast and furious that the siding came off of my house. This has been the worst winter ever! I got to keep an eye out for polar bears and possible yeti activity. What the H is going on out there!

I'll tell you, that wind over the weekend was the worst I think I've ever experienced. Well, that's not true. The worst wind was right after that free taco night during finals week back in college. It ate the paint right off of the bleachers during graduation. They tried repainting them, but...

Anyway, it's been a bad winter. Where is my scarf?

Groaningly yours,
Steve


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Jokes? Comments? Questions? Email Steve

*-- He Did Him A Favor --*

A man said his credit card was stolen but he decided not to report it because the thief was spending less than his wife did.

*-- Awkward! --*

Employer: "Where did you receive your training?"

Applicant: "Yale."

Employer: "Great, what's your name?"

Applicant: "Yim Yohnson."

Turn Your Backyard into a Tropical Paradise! Get the Solar-Powered Torches Before They're Gone

*-- Q and A Quickies --*

Q: What do you call a guy who never farts in public?

A: A private tutor.


Q: Why did the kid start a gardening service?

A: He wanted to rake in some cash!


Q: What goes up when the rain come down?

A: An umbrella!