January 27, 2019
Greetings Laff Lovers,
If you have turned on the Internet in the last few days you have heard about the 'conflict' between the high school kid wearing a MAGA hat and the native American demonstrating at the Lincoln Memorial in Washington, D.C. The initial story was a real nightmare, and it all started with a picture. The picture was of the snotty, pasty-faced little kid in his red Make America Great Again hat, grinning like a retard in the face of a venerable, old Indian who was calmly banging a tribal drum. It didn't help that the high school kid was surrounded by 20 or so of his classmates, all white and appearing to act like wild animals.
The way it was portrayed by the news media was that this gang of white supremacists mobbed this peaceful demonstrator while yelling racial slurs in an attempt to intimidate him. The entire story was concocted from about 60 seconds of video, from which that damning image was taken.
As you can imagine, Twitter, Facebook, the news media, talk show hosts and talking heads all went insane over the story within hours. A few extremists on social media even suggested that the little monsters should be murdered. Well, how else are you going to fight racism? Exterminate it. Kill it at the root. A dead 14-year-old racist won't turn into a dangerous 40-year-old racist.
Within 48 hours the kid in the picture was doxxed (that is his personal documentation was found and made public) and he began receiving death threats, his parents began receiving threats, even his school began receiving threats. They had to cancel classes because they were afraid someone was going to fire bomb it.
It was great news.
Unfortunately, none of it was true. Eventually a nearly 2 hour video of the entire event surfaced and it appears the facts are almost the exact opposite of the narrative that sprang to life online. The high school kids were waiting for a bus. THEY were the target of racial harassment. And the old Indian demonstrator crossed the mall to confront THEM, selecting the kid in the MAGA hat to stand in front of and bang a drum in his face.
But that hasn't stopped the news media. Some sources are STILL repeating the original story. It's hard to blame them. A great story like that doesn't come along every day.
What do you think? There is a poll up on www.bizarrenews.com
and I'd love to see your opinion. Once you vote you can see what everybody else thinks.
Send me comments, jokes and pictures of all the hot women in your family at this link: firstname.lastname@example.org
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"A new study found that good-looking people are more likely to have daughters than sons. And ugly people are more likely to have cats." -Jimmy Fallon
Little Johnny goes to school and the teacher says, "Today we are going to learn multi-syllable words. Does anybody have an example of a multi-syllable word?"
Johnny raises his hand and says, "Mas-tur-bate."
The teacher smiles and says, "Wow Johnny, that's a mouthful."
Little Johnny says, "No, Miss Rogers, you're thinking of a blowjob."
"A new study came out that found the more porn a man watches, the less motivation he has. I was going to read more about the study, but for some reason I just completely lost interest." -Conan O'Brien
Eddie, wanted desperately to have sex with this really cute, really hot girl in his office...but she was dating someone and wouldn't give him the time of day.
Finally Eddie got so frustrated that he went to her and said, "I know you're not interested in a relationship with me, but I'll give you $100 if you just let me have sex with you."
The girl responded with an immediate and offended, "NO!"
Eddie said, "I'll be real fast. I'll throw the money on the floor, you bend down and I'll finish by the time you've picked it up. I promise!"
She thought for a moment and said that she would consult with her boyfriend.
So she called him and explained the situation. Her boyfriend said, "He must be crazy! Ask him for $200, and pick up the money really fast. He won't even be able to get his pants down and we'll be 200 bucks richer."
She agreed and accepts the proposal.
10 minutes goes by and the boyfriend is still waiting for his girlfriend's call. Finally, after 15 minutes the boyfriend calls and asks, "Well... what happened???"
Still breathing hard, she managed to reply, "The bastard had all change!"