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January 19, 2019

Greetings fellow Bizarros:

New 4 BelowThere are lots of different ways to achieve fame. You can be really great at something. You could do something really spectacular, or heroic. You could invent something, make a ton of money and maybe change the world. But those are all really hard.

Now, thanks to the Internet, you can be famous just by doing something really stupid, as long as it is recorded. Being drunk helps, too. Sometimes this is referred to as 'Hold my beer and watch this.'

One such incident happened recently on a Royal Caribbean cruise ship. All of the prerequisites are there; a lot of stupidity, alcohol, and a camera. And surprisingly, the idiot lived.

Royal Caribbean said a 27-year-old cruise passenger has been banned after he filmed himself jumping from the boat for an Instagram video.

Nick Naydev posted a video to Instagram showing how he jumped from the 11th deck of Royal Caribbean's Symphony of the Seas, the world's largest cruise ship, while it was docked last week in the Bahamas.

"I was still drunk from the previous night," Naydev explained. "When I woke up I just decided to jump."

Naydev was picked up by a nearby small boat and brought back to the cruise liner, where crew members told him he and his companions were being kicked out. Naydev said he spoke to local police, but they told him charges were not being sought.

"This was stupid and reckless behavior, and he and his companions have been banned from ever sailing with us again," Royal Caribbean said in a statement to USA Today. "We are exploring legal action."


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Pet Alligator Is An Emotional Support Animal

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A Pennsylvania man says his pet alligator is an emotional support animal, and he has been taking the reptile to visit the elderly. Joie Henney, who hosted his own hunting and fishing show from 1989 until 2000 on outlets including ESPN Outdoors, and his 4 1/2-foot alligator, Wally, paid a visit to the Glatfelter Community Center at assisted living development the Village at Sprenkle Drive north of York. Henney encouraged residents and staff members not to be afraid of the alligator's mouth full of teeth. "He's just like a dog," Henney told the York Daily Record. "He wants to be loved and petted." He said Wally pays frequent visits to schools and senior centers. Henney said the alligator is a registered emotional support animal. Henney said Wally spends the bulk of his time in a 300-gallon pond in his living room. He said the gator enjoys watching TV and hiding in his home's cupboards.

Rule 36

27-year-old Kenneth Connin has fulfilled his wet dream of doing porn. In the world of the Internet you wouldn't think that would be a hard thing to do. The only hitch was, Kenneth is a quadriplegic. He lost the use of his legs and the feeling in his arms from the biceps down when he suffered a spinal cord injury at 18 years old while competitive cheerleading. But according to Kenneth, "Just because I'm injured and I have certain limitations, [it] doesn't mean that I don't still enjoy pleasure and I don’t still enjoy touch." Kenneth filmed his scene with gay porn star Pierce Paris, and reported that he could not be happier with how things turned out. "I'm proud of what I'm doing and who I am and I think everyone else should be too," he reported.


Lewis, I'm surprised some tiny little island off the Spanish coast would have a zoo big enough for a gorilla.

Lewis, that story reminded me of the end of Trading Places with Eddie Murphy and Dan Aykroyd. Do they really need guy running around in a gorilla costume in order to practice emergency routines?

Have you ever been on a subway train? I would sooner sit pantsless on a public street than on some subway seats. That's gross.