January 16, 2019
Greetings fellow Bizarros:
Frantic zoo keepers rushed to call an ambulance after a vet shot a tranquillizer dart at a man dressed as a gorilla.
Police on the Spanish island of Tenerife received a call from a panicked member of the public, who said that a gorilla had escaped from its pen in Loro Park zoo, and was seen running around the theme park.
A vet was called, and on spotting the creature fired a tranquillizer dart at its leg with enough sedative to fell a 200 kilo beast.
But to his horror, the vet - who had only been in the job for two months - realized that the creature was in fact an employee of the zoo, dressed in a gorilla suit, who was staging a mock escape to practice their emergency routines.
The 35-year-old man was taken to the island's University Hospital after the shooting. He was said to be in a serious condition, having suffered an allergic reaction to the tranquillizer, but was expected to make a full recovery.
He is lucky he wasn't in the United States where he probably would have been murdered to death.
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The morning commute for some Arizona drivers was a little stickier than normal Monday as an accident involving a tanker truck caused "a river of chocolate" to flow over the westbound lanes of the I-40 near Flagstaff. The tanker truck was carrying some 3,500 gallons of liquid chocolate when it was involved in an unspecified accident causing the vehicle to rollover and dump its sweet cargo on the highway, the Arizona Department of Public Safety said in a tweet. "This will be a sweet cleanup!" the ADPS said. This is not the first accident in recent months involving liquid chocolate - a storage tank at a chocolate factory in Germany overflowed and about one ton of the country's iconic sweet flowed through the factory's gates and into a road, solidifying into a 33-square-foot "choco-pancake," according to the Werl Fire Brigade, which participated in the cleanup.
Commuters Drop Drawers for Subway Ride
Hundreds of commuters in two dozen cities around the world dropped their trousers for the annual Global No Pants Subway Ride. The No Pants Subway Ride, which began in 2002 as a stunt by "prank collective" Improv Everywhere, was held Sunday in cities including London, Copenhagen, Buenos Aires, Chicago, San Francisco and Berlin. The flagship event in New York saw dozens of people braving 32-degree weather to ride the subway in their underwear. "There is no agenda for the event apart from a desire to make others laugh and smile," Improv Everywhere said on its website. "Improv Everywhere founder Charlie Todd refers to the event as a 'celebration of silliness.'"
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I've had 2 lucid dreams. Both years ago, probably in my 20s. I don't remember what they were about anymore but I remember realizing I was dreaming and basically enjoying the dreams. I also remember feeling fully rested and energized... and also enjoying thinking about the dream throughout the day. Never knew it had a name. Thanks.
[The incredible way I felt after waking up was almost as amazing as the dream experience itself. And the clear, focused, energized feeling lasted all day. Repeating the experience would be worth it just for that.]
I suspect that you will be inundated with references to Carlos Castaneda from old hippies and stoners like me. In his books he tells of his learnings from an Indian named Don Juan who gave him a step by step method to achieve lucid dreaming. As a young man I tried to follow the process to see if I could do it. I did, but it scared me so much that I quit trying. If you want to give it a go, start with the book 'The Teachings of Don Juan'. Best of luck.
[It is a frightening experience, isn't it?]
I have occasional lucid dreams, but I don't know of any actual way to initiate them. They just happen when they happen for me. I haven't explained astral projection... at least, not yet. -Chris
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