Subscibe to DEAL OF THE DAY

December 31, 2018

Good Morning Groanies,

Winter2018I'm making a New Year's Resolution and I'm going to stick with it for as long as I possibly can. I'm making a stand. Or is it taking a stand? Whichever.

Here's my resolution: As of January 1st, I, Steve of the Daily Groaner, will hereby be more positive and not complain so much about the unfathomable stupidity of those clods that can't help but do, say, and perpetuate stupid crap that makes me want to bang my head on my desk until I blackout!

Hey, I still got today to get it out of my system. Oh, who am I kidding? I'm not going to complain. Yeah, and I'm gonna start working out, too!

Have a Happy New Year!

Groaningly yours,

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Jokes? Comments? Questions? Email Steve

*-- I'm A Dog --*

A man walks into a doctor's office and says, "Doc, you have to help. I think I'm a dog."

The doctor says, "How long have you had this feeling?"

The man responds, "Ever since I was a puppy."

*-- Let's Face It... --*

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Finding one of her students making faces at others on the playground, Ms. Smith stopped to gently reprove the child.

Smiling sweetly, the Sunday School teacher said, "Bobby, when I was a child, I was told that if I made ugly faces, it would freeze and I would stay like that."

Bobby looked up and replied, "Well, Ms. Smith, you can't say you weren't warned."

*-- Q and A Quickies --*

Q: Why did the child study in the airplane?

A: He wanted a higher education.

Q: How did the farmer fix his jeans?

A: With a cabbage patch.

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