December 25, 2018

Good Afternoon,

Merry Christmas to all! I really hope the holiday finds you well. I'll keep things brief and then I'll see you next week!

Now, enjoy today's holiday themed issue. Great holiday movie quotes, answering that age-old question "Is Die Hard a Christmas movie?", and a hilarious joke list that will surely help to enhance your holiday spirit!

Mouthing Off,
Carl

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[m] q u o t e s . o f . t h e . d a y

"He looks like a deranged Easter Bunny."
--Darren McGavin as the Old Man in A Christmas Story

"We elves try to stick to the four main food groups: candy, candy canes, candy corns, and syrup."
--Will Ferrell as Buddy in Elf

"You guys give up? Or are you thirsty for more?"
--Macaulay Culkin as Kevin McCallister in Home Alone

[m] What's On the Web?

'Die Hard' Is A Christmas Movie, Everybody Shut Up
From Cracked.com: It is! Deal with it! Merry Christmas!

Visit: 'Die Hard' Is A Christmas Movie, Everybody Shut Up

[m] b i t s . n . b o b s

*-- Santa Hates Your Kid --*
8. Kid's letter to north pole comes back stamped, "Dream on, Chester!"

7. Kid asks for new bike, gets pack of smokes.

6. Along with presents, Santa leaves hefty bill for shipping and handling.

5. By the time he gets to your house, all he has left is foam packing.

4. Christmas day, your kid wakes up with a Reindeer head in his bed.

3. Instead of "Naughty" or "Nice", Santa has him on the stupid list.

2. Labels on all your kid's toys read "Straight from Craptown."

1. Four words: "Off my lap, Tubby!"