December 03, 2018

Good Morning,

It was my birthday on Saturday! Don't worry, I'll give you the address where gifts can be sent. I love getting gifts, who doesn't? I especially love getting gifts that are peculiarly funny or silly.

Here's one item that particularly tickles my funny bone - it's the Fully-Functional Jumbo Lighter!

Yes, it looks a little ridiculous, but that's the fun! The pockets in MC Hammer's pants aren't even big enough to contain this thing. Just imagine the looks on party guests faces when you bust this behemoth out to light birthday candles or when they discover it as their grab-bag gift...priceless, right? Click Here to head on over to PulseTV to take a gander at the pictures and video for the Fully-Functional Jumbo Lighter.

I know I wouldn't mind getting one for the fun of it, but I'd enjoy it even more for its practicality. The design is every bit as rugged and functional as the typical size lighter. It uses a flint wheel for ignition and the tank can be removed from the hinged case to refuel the lighter as needed.

Regardless of the size, the Fully-Functional Jumbo Lighter always comes in handy in a BIG way! It makes a great gift for every occasion, especially as a white elephant gift. So light up somebody's holiday with the Fully-Functional Jumbo Lighter.

Click here to order the Fully-Functional Jumbo Lighter

Thanks for reading! Now, let's get to more humorous hilarity and such.

Groaningly yours,
Steve

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Jokes? Comments? Questions? Email Steve

*-- Putting on Cold Cream --*

Little Billy's mom was rubbing moisturizing cream on her face as Billy walked in.

"Mommy, what are you doing?" he asked.

"I'm putting cold cream on my face," she replied.

"Why, Mommy?" Billy asked.

"To make my skin look beautiful," she said.

When she started wiping the cold cream off her face with a kleenex, Billy said, "Gosh, Mom, you're giving up already?"

*-- He's Outside My Window! --*

It was three o'clock in the morning, and the receptionist at a posh hotel was just dozing off, when a little old lady came running towards her, screaming.

"Please come quickly!" she yelled, "I just saw a naked man outside my window!"

The receptionist immediately rushed up to the old lady's room.

"Where is he?" asked the receptionist.

"He's over there," replied the little old lady, pointing to an apartment building opposite the hotel.

The receptionist looked over and could see a man with no shirt on, moving around his apartment.

"It's probably a man who's getting ready to go to bed," she said reassuringly. "And how do you know he's naked, you can only see him from the waist up?"

"The dresser!" screamed the old lady. "Try standing on the dresser!"

*-- Q and A Quickies --*

Q: What's the best part about living in Switzerland?

A: Not sure, but the flag is a big plus.


Q: Why didn't the lifeguard save the hippie?

A: Because he was too far out, man!


Stay Warm and Spread Cheer with the LED Flashing Holiday Hats and Scarves