October 31, 2018

Greetings fellow Bizarros:

It's hard being in a relationship. Say you want to spend a quiet night at a friend's house watching movies, but your boyfriend wants to go to a Halloween party. If you're dating an asshole a minor disagreement like that could turn into an assault. And if you're very unlucky, your asshole boyfriend with anger management issues could attack you in public while wearing a ridiculous costume. On the plus side; after the police arrest him you have the perfect excuse to break up.

Police report 19-year-old Patrick Gallway, of Port St. Lucie, Florida, allegedly pushed his girlfriend to the ground and proceeded to hold her down by the neck.

The confrontation came shortly after the 23-year-old woman arrived at his residence and was met by Gallway "wearing an inflatable dinosaur costume in preparation for a Halloween party."

The victim, who told police she was in a "strained relationship" with Gallway, said that she wanted the couple to go to a friend's house to watch a movie. Gallway, she noted, "demanded that she attend the Halloween party with him." Her account of the attack was supported by a witness who told police that he "separated the two parties."

Not wanting a little incident of assault to ruin his night, Gallway went to the party by himself. He was arrested around 2:45 AM when he returned to his residence. Unfortunately he was not wearing the costume at the time of his arrest, as that would have made a great mugshot.

Bizarrely,
Lewis

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Questions? Comments? Email: lewis@gophercentral.com

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Do Oregon Witches Float?

Hundreds of "witches" traded in broomsticks for paddles in Oregon during the last weekend before Halloween. The costumed coven paddled six miles on boards along the Willamette River, which divides the city of Portland. The Oregonian/OregonLive reported that the paddleboard event started two years ago with a handful of participants but now attracts hundreds. Participants donated packages of socks, underwear and T-shirts to a local nonprofit group before they started paddling. Spectators who were caught off guard by the witches watched from the shoreline.

Bizarre Addams Family Trivia

After John Astin's first sitcom, "I'm Dickens, He's Fenster," was canceled, he auditioned for "The Addams Family," and was turned down...for the part of Lurch. He didn't even try out for Gomez. But the producer spied John leaving the room, grabbed him, and offered him the lead role on the spot. The only condition: Astin had to grow a mustache.

It took Carolyn Jones two hours every day to put on Morticia's makeup. The final touch: she wore a wig made of human hair.

Jones was only the producer's 3rd choice to play Morticia. ABC insisted that they needed a "name" actress, and Jones was the only well-known performer in the running, so she got the part.

Cousin Itt's voice was supplied by "Addams" producer Nat Perrin, who recited gibberish into a tape recorder and played it back at a higher speed.

Creator Charles Addams, who'd never given his characters first names, had to come up with some for the TV show. Within a week he'd decided on all of them - except for Mr. Addams, who almost wound up being called "Repelli" (for repellant) instead of Gomez.

Lurch got fan mail from teenage girls who thought he was cuter than the Beatles.

The unique interior of the Addams house was inspired by the real-life Manhattan apartment of Charles Addams, which contained suits of armor, an antique cross-bow collection, and other odds-and-ends.

READER COMMENTS

I'm just wondering, did the spiders survive the fire?
[Yes, but they had to find a new residence.]


Aloha, Every now and then I miss reading one of your Bizarre News e-mails and try to do it at a later date, usually after I have received a new Bizarre News e-mail. However, when I click the link where it says Read the rest of the story at www.bizarrenews.com, I only get the latest e-mail story. When I tried to catch up it was always the latest story but NOT the ones listed in the previous e-mails. WHY? -Fred
[Fortunately we have all of the Bizarre News issues archived. Just click the 'Archive' link at the top of every email and you can read years worth of Bizarre News, along with back issues of our 30 other email publications.]


Not every woman will try to bite your genitals off after a three-way, unfortunately the type of women that would double up on a dude like me probably would.
[Funny movie. Thanks for the quote.]

END OF READER COMMENTS