Subscribe to CLEAN LAFFS
 
Subscibe to DEAL OF THE DAY
 



Friday, September 7, 2018

Good morning crew,

I'm sure everybody who reads Clean Laffs is aware of the e-commerce side of GopherCentral.com which is www.PulseTV.com. They are both the same company, which means that frequently I write advertising copy for PulseTV and sometimes they ask me to do product videos.

But I never get asked to do videos for the popular best-sellers, like the Bamboo Luxury Pillow, the Copper Flipwich Sandwich Maker or the Hurricane Power Scrubber.

For some reason I always get asked to do videos for the odd, niche items. The last video I was in was for the Butterfly Bottle Opener, and most recently I did the Jumbo Lighter.

Granted, these are cool items, but they don't have the mass appeal of the more popular stuff. I mean, everybody could use a comfy, hypoallergenic Bamboo Pillow, but it takes a certain kind of eccentric to buy a fully-functional giant lighter.

Maybe I just have the kind of face that appeals to people who get a kick out of pulling out a 4 1/2-inch tall lighter to light a cigar.

If you want to see my sales 'chops' or check out the lighter just click Jumbo Lighter.

Who knows, maybe I have a hidden talent as a YouTube sensation.

And if you are one of those eccentrics who likes unique stuff like this, it's a pretty good deal at $9.99.

Laugh it up,

Joe

joe@gophercentral.com

P.S. Did you miss an issue? You can read every issue from the Gophercentral library of newsletters on our exhaustive archives page. Thousands of issues, all of your favorite publications in chronological order. You can read AND comment. Just click GopherArchives





"Labor Day is over, so, get out your fall clothes, and then just put them away because it's 100 degrees outside." -Jimmy Fallon

***

"They estimate that more than 16 million Americans traveled by air over the holiday weekend. And here's a fun statistic. They did a study. The germiest place at theairport, the place with the highest levels of virus bacteria, are those plastic security tubs at the TSA. Which is kind of surprising. I mean, who would have ever guessed that the tubs where a million sweaty travelers throw their shoes every day would be full of germs?" -Jimmy Kimmel

***

"Florida police are searching for a person who accidentally donated a duffel bag to a thrift shop that contained almost five pounds of marijuana. 'This smells like weed,' said customers about EVERY THRIFT STORE ITEM EVER." -Seth Meyers

***

Suspecting he had a serious medical condition, I nagged my husband until he agreed to see a doctor. Once there, he was handed a clipboard full of forms to fill out.

Next to "Reason for visit?" he wrote, "My wife made me."




*-------------- Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes --------------*

Nancy was Catholic, but her fiance, Chris, was not. Since my friends were planning to be married in the Catholic Church, Chris made sure to listen carefully throughout their prenuptial sessions. At one meeting the priest turned to Chris and told him, "Since you are not Catholic, we shall have the ceremony without Eucharist."

Later that day, Chris was noticeably upset, so Nancy asked what was wrong. "I don't understand," he said. "How can we have the ceremony without me?"