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Saturday, August 25, 2018

Greetings fellow Bizarros:

President Trump is up to his old tricks again; deporting immigrants, but this time it's a little different and antifa must be very conflicted. The liberal left loves immigrants and hates Nazis, but what if the immigrant IS a Nazi?

At the order of President Donald Trump, Immigration and Customs Enforcement agents removed 95-year-old Jakiw Palij from his Queens, New York, home.

Palij gained entry into the U.S. in 1949 after telling U.S. authorities he spent World War II at his hometown in Germany. He was eventually granted U.S. citizenship in 1957.

But the Justice Department says Palij served as an armed guard at a death camp in Nazi-occupied Poland and lied to American immigration officials about his role in those atrocities when he entered the U.S. after the war. Governmental efficiency being what it is, it only took federal authorities until 2003 to track him down and expose him.

A New York immigration judge revoked Palij's U.S. citizenship and ordered him to be deported in 2005. But somehow he has managed to remain in the U.S. until now. But America isn't as welcoming to immigrants as it used to be.

Palij, frail and invalid, was removed from his home by wheelchair and deported to Germany. There were no demonstrations to try and stop his deportation.

Germany had previously maintained that they were not in a position to accept him because he's not a German citizen, so Palij's final fate is uncertain.

My question is; what took him so long to be discovered, and once he was, what took him so long to be deported? Is there a conspiracy? Has the government been hiding Nazis?


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The Ball's In the Other Court In Castration Case

I have had fights with my wife before, and never has it involved our genitals. But apparently they fight a little dirtier in North Carolina, because when a woman there got into a fight with her boyfriend she tried to bite off his testicles, among other things. Local news outlets have reported that despite ripping open her boyfriend's scrotum, apparently with her teeth, a jury found 54-year-old Martinne Delavega not guilty of malicious castration. The boyfriend testified that he punched her head to stop her as she bit his chest and arms and ripped open his scrotum during an argument. But when Delavega took the stand she claimed she was defending herself from his assault. The jury agreed with her. The boyfriend says he still has psychological and physical problems. My question is; why were they fighting naked?


*--------- Mmmm, That's Good Baby Poo ----------*

I'm sure you've heard of probiotics. Probiotics are live bacteria and yeasts that are good for you, especially your digestive system. Usually they come from foods like yogurt and other dairy products, but scientists at Wake Forest School of Medicine in North Carolina have recently discovered a particularly effective strain of probiotics in baby poop. Why they were looking there, I don't know. They have created a 'cocktail' of it to feed to mice which had an astonishingly positive impact on their gut health. The test results suggest that these probiotics could help treat people with diabetes, obesity, autoimmune disorders and certain cancers. All you would have to do is get comfortable with eating bacteria that came from baby poop.

*-------------- READER COMMENTS --------------*

As the guy said, "Of course it is a female animal, what do you think, I'm a queer?"

They were laughing at one for choosing the ugliest one in the herd. But you can't pull the wool over the deputy's eyes, when the other started messing with the Sheriff's girl in her sexy, revealing, summer coat... that's when the law went down on them.
[I should have expected all of the bestiality after the last issue.]

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