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Friday, August 17, 2018

Good morning crew,

We have plans to go to the Hofbrauhaus in Rosemont this weekend. Do I really need to say any more? Do I need to describe the hot, crispy goodness of Kartoffelpuffer, counter-pointed by the cold, creaminess of smoked salmon and sour cream?

Or the juicy deliciousness of the wienerschnitzel so large they serve it on a turkey platter, lightly breaded and deep fried to a tender golden brown, served with a human brain-sized scoop of German potato salad?

And lest anybody think I am not health conscious, I might preface my meal with a salad. The Munchner Wurstsalat, which is a sausage salad marinated in Vinegar and Oil with onions, sliced Swiss Cheese, Rye Bread and Butter.

Of course the entire exercise would be anticlimactic without the admixture of several quarts of cold, foamy Hofbrau Dunkel beer.

That is what makes the difference between a meal and an experience.

Laugh it up,


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"A new study finds that Americans have on average become several inches shorter in the past 100 years. But scientists say it's mainly because we're all looking down at our phones." -Jimmy Fallon


"Auntie Anne's has announced it will begin selling pumpkin spice pretzel nuggets next month. So if you like pumpkin spice and you like eating at the mall... you could probably use some good news." -Seth Meyers


"I've been trying to say 'I love you' more often, starting this morning. I said it to my family before I left the house. And then to my barista. And then to her manager, when the barista complained that one of the customers was making her uncomfortable." -Stephen Colbert


One day while jogging, a middle-aged man noticed a tennis ball lying by the side of the walk. Being fairly new and in good condition, he picked the ball up, put it in his pocket and proceeded on his way.

Waiting at the cross street for the light to change, he noticed a young woman standing next to him smiling.

Noticing the rather distinct bulge she asked, "What do you have in your pocket?"

"Tennis ball," the man said, smiling back.

"Wow!" said the woman looking upset. "That must hurt. I once had tennis elbow and the pain was terrible!"

*-------------- Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes --------------*

Little Noah came into the house with a new harmonica. "Grandpa, do you mind if I play this in here?"

"Of course not, Noah. I love music. In fact, when your grandma and I were young, music saved my life."

"What happened?"

"Well, it was during the famous Johnstown flood. The dam broke and when the water hit out house it knocked it right off the foundation. Grandma got on the dining room table and floated out safely."

"What about you?"

"Me? I accompanied her on the piano!"